


That's Not My Baby

by allonsysilvertongue



Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: F/M, Post - Mockingjay, Surviving after the war, pregnancy fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-03
Updated: 2016-05-21
Packaged: 2018-05-04 15:48:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 28,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5339714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allonsysilvertongue/pseuds/allonsysilvertongue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He had not heard from her for years since the Rebellion ended and when he met her by chance, she surprised him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Plutarch Heavensbee was convinced that Haymitch spent far too much time alone in his empty house and that it was by no means a healthy way to live. So he made it his mission to keep Haymitch in the Capitol for as long as he could whenever the man came by for official business.

Haymitch hated those official businesses that involved Paylor pushing papers trying to pass a new bill all in the name for a better Panem. That one time he promised to help became another and then yet another until he found himself being an unofficial government figure. He didn't know what he was doing but if Paylor and Plutarch liked whatever half-baked nonsensical opinion he gave each time they came looking for him then he wasn't going to question them much.

As it was, he had just managed to escape from Plutarch and had taken a rather long road, not his usual route just to avoid being tracked down by that infuriating man. He found himself at what was once the Training Centre. In its place was a sprawling, impressive shopping mall.

Haymitch stood across the street with his hands in his coat pocket, watching the crowd as they entered and leave the mall. He wondered how many of them actually remembered what the ground they stood upon meant at one point of time; if the number of children trained to kill and die there meant anything to them like it did for him, those agonising weeks he spent wasting his youth (and the better part of his adulthood) at the Penthouse mentoring kids without much hope of saving them, the friendship he had with the other Victors especially with Chaff or the countless argument he had with Effie Trinket over really trivial, mundane matters like the choice of colour for his tie.

For a drunk, Haymitch remember things well even those memories he'd rather not have, memories that only contributed to his nightmares. With a shake of his head, he walked away. He kept his head low, pulling his coat tighter around him to ward off the chill of the wind. On the rare occasion when he wasn't too drunk and was able to control the motor movement of his feet, Haymitch actually enjoyed walking. It gave him a chance to think and internalise his own thoughts.

A car screeched past him, jolting his awareness back to his surroundings. The city centre was far behind him. He realised that he had entered into an unfamiliar neighbourhood area in the Capitol. Haymitch stopped by the junction, craning his neck around to figure out where he was while he waited for the green man to come on.

A woman stepped up next to him, rubbing her hands up and down her arms. Haymitch glanced down at her briefly, contemplating if he should ask the stranger of his current location. As if sensing his gaze, she turned and smiled politely at him. They both did a double-take at the same time.

"Effie?"

"Haymitch," she breathed out in surprise.

It was so unexpected that for a long while, Haymitch did nothing but stare at her. Nobody's heard from her for years and to cross paths with her at such a random traffic junction in an unsuspecting neighbourhood was too great a coincidence. He'd been at the Capitol more times than he could count since the Rebellion and not once had he caught sight of her. There were times when he asked himself about her – if she was alright, if she'd found her footing and was leading her life as well as she could, if she was plagued by nightmares as he was, if she'd forgiven him for leaving her in the Capitol and allowing her to be captured and he wondered if she was alive because if no one's ever heard from her then who really knows her fate?

She was different, in a lot of ways, and not just because she was no longer painted in pale powder and bright eye shadows that usually matched her wigs. Effie looked tired and exhausted. She seemed troubled, almost fidgety. Her eyes darted back and forth from him to the traffic lights, waiting for it to turn green and when it did, she hurried past him without a goodbye.

"Woah, woah, Trinket, slow down," he called out, taking long strides across the street and pulling her by the elbows.

Effie gave him a pointed look and he released his hold on her. "It was nice meeting you, Haymitch, but I – I… need to get back."

"You stay around here?"

"Yes," she replied.

"Ah. Didn't expect to meet you here. This neighbourhood doesn't seem like the sort you'd live in – not grand or anything."

"As if your house is any better?" came her snarky reply.

"Fair point. Congratulations," he offered, nodding towards the swell of her belly, "for the baby. Went missing for years and look at you; married and with a child."

Effie kept quiet, giving him a faint smile. The situation was becoming increasingly tense and it felt as though he was grasping at straws trying to get somewhere with the woman in front of him. Since when did talking to Effie become so difficult? She always had something to say, some observations about his appearance that she had to make to complete her day but there was nothing, only the uncomfortable silence as she waited for the moment when she could quickly depart.

"So… who's this unfortunate person you've managed to bribe into spending the rest of his life with you?"

She looked annoyed but Haymitch was beginning to get the feeling that this topic made her uncomfortable. Effie shuffled her weight from one foot to the other and picking on the flesh of her palm.

"Just because you have to bribe a woman, if you ever wanted to settle down, doesn't mean everyone else have to," she replied coolly. "Anyway, this has been nice. I best be going home. Goodbye."

He was slightly taken aback by her attitude. She was more short-tempered and … angry which was curious in itself. Haymitch spun around and cut off her path. "What's your rush? We haven't seen each other in six years."

"It must have been a very peaceful six years for you," she gave him a tight lipped smile. "As I recall, I'm not exactly your favourite person."

"You're not," he nodded. "Aren't you going to invite me up to your house? That's the polite thing to do, isn't it? You're all into those manners shit."

"Haymitch," she sighed. "Let's not… Let's not do this. You and I – we may have a working history together but there's nothing between us anymore. We're not escort and mentor. You've never liked me so I don't see why we have to do this. The Games are over; your war's won and just… let me live my life."

"How long have you prepared that speech, Trinks?" he smirked. "There's nothing? Really? We're not going to talk about where you've been all these while? You weren't at any of the celebratory parties they insisted on throwing every anniversary of Snow's death."

"You were looking for me?" she raised a cynical eyebrow.

"Yes – No, I meant no. I just can't help but notice that an irritating shrill voice was missing at every party I've attended. You know that voice that's always hissing telling me not to get drunk? Yeah that one."

Effie tried to hide a smile. "I have my reasons for not attending."

"You're different," he remarked after a while. "Haven't seen you around in ages thought you'd be happy to see I'm alive and haven't died from alcohol poisoning. As much as you were a pain to be around with it's good to know you're doing okay after …you know, after…," he waved his hand carelessly indicating a time, years ago when she went through the ordeal of being imprisoned.

Effie nodded, looking back at the rotating door of her apartment building. Haymitch knew when his presence was no longer welcome.

"You better go then, stranger," he said, finally. "I've a train to catch, anyway. Oh, and tell your husband good luck. Any guy who is stuck with you would need all the luck in the world!"

He laughed and walked off. He was nearly around the corner when he heard her called for him. Haymitch turned, waiting for her to speak up.

"Maybe… Would you like to come up for a cup of tea?"

He frowned. "You were against that a few minutes ago."

"Do you want a hot drink in this cold weather or not?" she snapped.

XxX

"You look big," he told her as they rode the lift up to her apartment.

"Thank you, Haymitch. You really do know how to make a woman feel better," she muttered.

"Anytime," he smirked. "But you really look like you've swallowed a planet."

She rolled her eyes, mumbling something about him still being extremely rude as she fished through her handbag for her keys.

For the second time that day, Haymitch found himself surprised. Her apartment was small and had none of the exquisite, high end furnishing of her previous apartment. It was warm and cosy but just as the neighbourhood was not a place he thought Effie would ever live in; the apartment reflected none of Effie's personality. It was bare and felt more like a temporary lodging than a place one would call home. There were no photographs or personal items to indicate that it belonged to her, that she lived here.

Upon her invitation, he seated himself on the armchair and from his seat Haymitch surveyed the place with marked interest. Effie was preparing the kettle for tea in the adjoining kitchen and adjacent to it was a small bedroom. The door was half open and he could see the single, neatly made bed in the centre of the room. That alone convinced Haymitch that there was more to the story than he knew.  _A single bed._

Effie reappeared a few minutes later, carrying two cups of hot tea. His eyes strayed to her empty ring finger.

"He's not home?" he tested. "Your husband."

Her pupils dilated when she heard the question, the cup in her hand hung in mid-air as her movements stilled. Effie followed his gaze down to her hand, at the finger where a ring should have been if she was married.

"I didn't say I was married," she said quietly.

Haymitch frowned, his mind thinking back to their conversation on the sidewalk. It was true. She said nothing about being married. It was something he assumed when he saw that she was pregnant. "The child's father?"

Her demeanour changed. She was stiff and brusque when she replied, "it's really none of your concern, is it?"

"You're gonna raise the child up on your own, then?"

Effie started blinking rapidly, trying to get rid of the tears that had gathered at the corner of her eyes; tears that clung like dew on her long eyelashes. Haymitch shifted in his seat. He should never have asked because now they've entered into a territory that had quite clearly evoked an emotional response from her and emotions were not something he was equipped to deal with.

"I wish I was," she whispered, wiping an errant tear with the back of her hand.

"You wish - " he broke off in confusion. If she wanted to raise the child then it made no sense to him the fact that she was acting as though there was something preventing her from doing so.

"I'm not – I'm not the mother," she said haltingly, staring at her cup of tea. Haymitch waited for the admission that he sense was coming. "This isn't my baby."

"I'm sorry?"

"I'm a surrogate."


	2. Chapter 2

 

**Chapter Two**

Haymitch blinked at her, aware that he probably looked stupid but what she told him made no sense at all.

"What's that mean – you a surrogate?" he asked, frowning.

Effie blew gently on her tea and brought it carefully to her lips. She took a sip before placing it back on its saucer. Sitting up a little straighter, Effie took a deep breath to calm her nerves but it was difficult when he was gazing at her so intently, waiting for an answer to his question.

"It's exactly what it means. I'm … It's someone else's child," she said only to have her voice caught in her throat. She had five months to accept that fact but it wasn't as easy as she thought it would be. "I'm just… carrying it to term. It's not my baby – not my egg that was fertilized."

Haymitch let out a breath and leaned back in his seat. He cocked his head to the side, studying her.

"And, uh, why would you do that? Why would anyone let someone else carry their baby? Why would  _you_ agree to such things?"

"I need the money."

You need the – " he snorted and Effie winced. Out of all the reasons, he was not expecting this one. "So you rent your womb out to people?"

Haymitch had always been crude but the hint of judgment in his voice made her bristled. She could feel the irritation prickling at her skin and she didn't bother trying to control it. Ever since the pregnancy, she felt different. It was the hormones, according to her doctor.

"Haymitch, if you're going to judge my life choices then I think it's best that you leave. I am tired and I – "

He raised both hands in peaceful gesture. "No, I don't mean it that way."

He couldn't leave now even if he wanted to. He was intrigued because it wasn't something he expected from her. On her part, Effie watched him as he stared at her stomach. It made her feel self-conscious. Her hand fluttered to the bump as if to shield it from view.

"When is that baby due?"

"In four months, if all goes well."

"And then what? You give that baby up?"

She shut her eyes and when she opened them again, she sounded detached. "Yes, that's the agreement. The baby's parents are waiting for its arrival, very eager parents."

The use of 'it' to refer to the baby did not go unnoticed by him. She was trying to maintain some distance, trying not to get attached but her act betrayed her - it always did - because her hand was back on her stomach, rubbing gentle circles around it.

"And who are the parents?"

"I don't know," she bowed her head. "I don't know anything about them, and they don't know me either. It's based on anonymity."

 _So that she can never go looking for the child she'll one day give up_ , he thought grimly. The house grew quiet. Haymitch watched her while she looked everywhere except him, focusing her attention mainly on her bump.

"Why this, sweetheart?" he asked the question that had been bugging him since the past few minutes.

Effie raised her head, startled by his question.

"The money is good, Haymitch, and I need it. It hasn't been easy for me since the war ended. I found jobs but they never lasted. I was fired in some or I resigned in others. It was too much. I couldn't function," she explained haltingly. "I sought treatment, of course, and I heard whispers at the hospitals about egg and sperm donor. They pay you handsomely for it. District Thirteen, it seemed, has been trying to do the same to boost their population which was why they were so welcoming of refugees. It was an option, a way out. I can use the money to get out of here, start somewhere new. I thought about it for weeks and when I thought I was finally ready, I went to the clinic but –"

"But?"

"I changed my mind at the last minute. I was afraid. In a few years, there could be a child out there with my genes; a child that's half of me, a child I will never know about, and I didn't want that. I don't want there to be a baby I didn't know about because I decided to donate my egg."

His tea had gone cold and it remained untouched. The entire conversation left him feeling squeamish and unsettled.

"The nurses at the clinic gave me another alternative, if I wanted it."

"Surrogacy," he breathed.

Effie nodded.

"It wasn't something new. Surrogacy has been around the Capitol for years. Women in the Capitol opted for it if they have the money. It was easier, faster, less of a hassle, and there were always women in the districts willing to carry the baby for money and food."

Haymitch chose not to dwell on it. Instead, he sunk his teeth on a different, equally sensitive topic.

"You said you could barely function. If you're having trouble on your own, how is being pregnant helping? Look, I don't know much about pregnancy but it's dangerous for you and that baby, isn't it?"

"That was my concern, too. But this facility," she gestured. "Yes, this is actually a facility, has everything. There are doctors to monitor my well-being, therapist, and psychologist. I'm not alone here. There are other women, too. People keep an eye on me. I haven't … I haven't had an episode for three months now. I think not being alone helps, too."

Haymitch said nothing to do. He surveyed the house again and he really did have a difficult time picturing her here. It didn't feel like Effie Trinket. There were no colours, no life. It was all so detached and clinical.

"This is my second," she admitted.

That was the third surprise he had this evening.

"The first time was a year ago. I had to wait for my body to recover before I could –"

"Why did you agree to a second if you've already have the money?" he demanded an answer. "Why didn't you just get out?"

There was a tinged on anger in his voice and he couldn't quite explain where that anger was coming from.

"It wasn't a success. I had a miscarriage. I was four months in, and - " she bit her lip because she was sure what she told him next would make him angry. "There's a penalty if you miscarriage. They cut half of what you're supposed to get."

"What?!" He thundered. "That's absurd. This is fucking insane."

"I'm hoping this one wouldn't suffer the same fate," she whispered. "They will cut me out of the programme otherwise."

"Is this place – "

"Oh, has it gotten cold?" Her eyes fell on his cup of tea and abruptly change the subject. "I can make you more!"

She stood up, feeling the sudden urge to get away from him.

"What? No. Sit down, Effs, sit back down. I don't want the damn tea," he snapped and she complied which was a problem in itself because the Effie he knew would have told him off for his manners. "Why didn't you come to Twelve? We could help."

"I – " she worried her hands in her lap. "I did thought of it but I didn't want to be a burden. Katniss and Peeta have demons of their own. They need to recover and get better. They've been through so much. I wouldn't want to impose and as for you… I didn't think you'll have anything to offer me."

"You think so little of me," he sneered.

"I was angry with you."

"Was? So you're not anymore?" he asked and it was almost pitiful how hopeful he sounded.

"I don't have the energy to be angry anymore. My therapist told me that holding on to that anger was detrimental to my well-being. I needed to move on, and I had to let it go."

"I would have helped, sweetheart," he told her truthfully. "No one's heard from you, and I looked but – "

"So you  _were_  looking for me," she smiled smugly.

"Sweetheart, you're a pain in my ass but if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have been captured. That was on me."

Effie kept quiet not denying the truth of that statement. He had kept her in the dark, kept secrets from her and she had to answer for him. She had been interrogated for weeks on end for answers she never knew about. They were never physical with her. They had to keep her face pretty just in case she was needed for the camera but she had been kept in isolation all the weeks that she was there with a blindfold over her eyes. She never knew her interrogators but she could tell them apart from their voices.

"I would have helped," he repeated.

"Thank you," she dipped her head. "That's all I needed to hear. That I'm not alone, not completely."

"You're not – we've been around each other too long for us to … It's a waste."

At that, she smiled and his lips curled into a half-smile too.

"I don't mean to chase you out but it's getting late and don't you have a train to catch?"

"My phone's fixed," he said suddenly. "You could call."

"Maybe," she shrugged.

Effie never shrugged but Effie wouldn't have been a surrogate either. People change. He changed and so did she, and he would have to accept that.

"You have a phone here, don't you?" he glanced around. "If you ain't gonna call me, I can call you."

"Why?" she asked curiously.

"Maybe I just miss the sound of your high-pitch voice. Give me your number. The kids will kill me if they knew I met you and I didn't get – "

She seemed agitated all of a sudden and when she grabbed his arm, he looked at her, really looked at her. There were dark circles under her eyes. Her skin had always been pale but she seemed sallow. He thought the facility was supposed to care for her but –

"Don't let them know …. Don't let them know about me," she pleaded. "About this."

"Effie – "

"Please, Haymitch."

"Okay, calm down, I won't tell them," he pried her fingers from his arm. That would leave bruises he was sure. "Give me your number – I want it."

She relaxed a little and jotted down the information on a scrap of paper.

"I highly doubt you'd call," she sniffed as if  _she_  knew him better than himself. "I am certain that you will forget once you reach Twelve."

"Well, if I don't call.  _You_  should pick up the phone and call me instead," he winked. "You're full of surprises, maybe I am, too."

"It's – It's really nice to see you again," she said and he almost missed it.

"Yeah, sweetheart, me too," he muttered gruffly. "You take care."

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

**Chapter 3**

Haymitch twirled the now creased piece of paper between his fingers, staring at it like he had been staring for the past three days. By now, he had already long memorized the number. He could put it to the flames and still, he would have no difficulties dialing the person to whom the number belonged to.

Haymitch grabbed the bottle and took a swig from it, letting the liquid burn down his throat. His fingers twitched, itching to pick up the phone. His eyes cut to the wall where the phone was calling out to him yet, he remained where he was with a drink in hand.

He couldn't shake Effie Trinket from his mind. He had been thinking about her; her situation, her pregnancy and the desperation she must have felt that compel her to resort to surrogacy.

Effie didn't ask for his help but a part of him felt that he should do something, that there was something he could do. Didn't he owe her…  _something?_

He had not told the kids about crossing paths with her either. If he did, they would most certainly ask after her well-being. A question be couldn't give an honest answer to because he didn't know if she was doing well given her circumstances. They would want to know about her and he didn't want to lie to them about her, just like he didn't want to betray her after promising to keep her condition quiet.

Haymitch fell asleep with Effie on his mind.

When he woke up the next day with a crick in his neck and the bottle rolling on the floor, it was already mid-day. The sun was glaring brightly outside and the geese were making a racket. Haymitch ambled over to the window and pulled the blinders down slightly. Squinting, he could make Katniss coming back from the woods, game in hand. She would clean up and join Peeta at the bakery. It was routine and he knew it well enough by now.

He kicked the empty bottle of whiskey aside. That was all he allowed himself nowadays - one bottle a day, at the very most. Crossing the room to the kitchen, he grumbled at the sight of the papers strewn all over the floor and the fax machine. Plutarch had given him a facsimile machine so that it was easier for him to send over documents and he must have send documents at night while he was still asleep.

He gathered the papers and glanced over them, noting the heading at the top of the document. It was the Avox Rehabilitation Program that the Council had been debating back and forth for the past two months. President Paylor and Plutarch, mostly Plutarch, had brought him in on it.

Peeta had left him a loaf of banana bread in his kitchen. The sight of it made his stomach grumbled. He grabbed a piece and picked up the phone, intending to call Plutarch. Instead, his fingers dialed someone else's number, a number he had been staring at for days.

The phone kept ringing and he was about to hang up when she answered.

"Effie Trinket speaking," she said.

"Sweetheart," he chewed on the bread.

"Oh, Haymitch, how rude," she cluck her tongue, disapprovingly. "Do swallow your food first."

"Good that you know it's me but what took you so long to answer the damn phone?"

"I just got home. I was at the doctor's."

"Why?" he took another bite from the bread. "Everything okay?"

"Yes," she answered. He could hear the clinks of spoon against a cup in the background. "Just a normal check-up to make sure everything is as it should be. The baby's healthy."

"And you?"

He placed the papers down. He would look through it later.

"My doctor said that I need to gain more weight. He's giving me a month to put on some."

Haymitch scoffed at that.

"Yeah, sweetheart, no kidding. I don't need to be a doctor to tell you that either. A little bit of fillin' out will do you some good."

"I know. I'm trying. The agency isn't too happy. The baby's healthy and all but … It's not good enough for them. Anyway, you never told me what you were doing at the Capitol when we cross paths," she was quick to change the subject. "I was very surprised to see you at the Capitol of all places, did you know?"

"Business," Haymitch answered, indulging her. If she didn't want to talk about it, fine, then he wouldn't press her.

"What kind?"

"Helping President Paylor – not my idea. Plutarch thinks it's a shame to let my mind go to waste and since I've got the time… Well, why the hell not. There's not much to do here."

"That's good that you're doing something. That's really good. So you're at the Capitol often, then?"

"Why, sweetheart, miss me already?" he teased and he wondered if he had gone too far because she was quiet all of a sudden.

He could still hear her breathing over the phone which meant she was still there.

"Said something wrong, did I?"

"No, no, you didn't," she spoke softly and he could almost see her with a small smile on her face. "You're the first familiar face I met since the war," she admitted. "I didn't know I miss it until now. I thought of you and the children often."

Haymitch rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes flitted to the papers on the table.

"I … I could visit," he suggested cautiously. "I'm at the Capitol every other month for a day or two. I ain't due to be there till a couple of weeks from now but I could… I've got some things I need to discuss with Plutarch anyway. He just sent them over documents yesterday night. Besides, the booze's great over there and the train won't be here till next week. I can use the chance to restock."

"And…?"

He clenched his jaws at the teasing tone in her voice. She would make him say it, he was sure. She wouldn't make the first move.

"You want to meet me or what?"

She laughed. "That would be lovely."

XxX

Katniss crossed her arms and frowned at him. "You  _just_  got back two weeks ago. It was last two weeks, wasn't it, Peeta?"

The boy nodded. Even he was curious now.

"So what now? You're keeping tabs when I come and go?"

"That's not what Katniss meant. We're just curious is all…" Peeta shrugged. "Everything alright at the Capitol?"

"It's the Avox situation," he told them which happened to be the truth since he did intend on meeting Plutarch to discuss the matter. "Paylor wants it to be expedited – thing's been on the table for months now and we ain't moving forward much."

What he didn't tell them was that he had been talking to Effie every day since that phone call. Except, most of the time now, it was Effie who would call him. He got a distinct feeling that she was lonely and now that they had 'reconnected' – a term he used lightly – she latched on the connection; to him, someone she knew from her past.

Their conversations centered on safe topics; the situation in the Capitol, the state in District Twelve, news on people they used to know like Annie, Finn and Johanna and in that particular instance, he was the one doing the updating since Effie was completely out of touch with them.

On his part, he learnt that she picked up knitting as a hobby. She grew very bored at the facility and devoured magazines like a hungry man would devour food. She couldn't work because being a surrogate was her job and if she intended to go out, she would have to report to the facility manager.

"Sounds like a damn prison," he had mumbled under his breath.

During the rare moments when she did talk about her pregnancy, Haymitch learnt that she was carrying a baby girl and that she found listening to her heart beat soothing and calming to her nerves. She was given a copy of the sonogram video and she admitted, reluctantly that she listened to it at night.

Haymitch was so close to telling her that she shouldn't get so attached but bit his tongue at the very last minute. He remembered her hanging up on him in tears after he said something particularly calloused – something about her diet. Where the Effie Trinket he knew would have cut him down with a scathing remark, this one was much more emotional in her pregnancy.

"Tomorrow is the day, then?"

"Yeah," he muttered gruffly. "See you tomorrow, stranger."

She laughed lightly and he figured that she must have remembered how he had called her that when he first met her at the traffic junction after six years.

"We won't be strangers anymore," she insisted. "We won't be. We've never been."

_Ah, I am so very glad that my return to this story was well-received! Thank you very much for still expressing an interest in this story :)))_

* * *

**Chapter 3**

Haymitch twirled the now creased piece of paper between his fingers, staring at it like he had been staring for the past three days. By now, he had already long memorized the number. He could put it to the flames and still, he would have no difficulties dialing the person to whom the number belonged to.

Haymitch grabbed the bottle and took a swig from it, letting the liquid burn down his throat. His fingers twitched, itching to pick up the phone. His eyes cut to the wall where the phone was calling out to him yet, he remained where he was with a drink in hand.

He couldn't shake Effie Trinket from his mind. He had been thinking about her; her situation, her pregnancy and the desperation she must have felt that compel her to resort to surrogacy.

Effie didn't ask for his help but a part of him felt that he should do something, that there was something he could do. Didn't he owe her…  _something?_

He had not told the kids about crossing paths with her either. If he did, they would most certainly ask after her well-being. A question be couldn't give an honest answer to because he didn't know if she was doing well given her circumstances. They would want to know about her and he didn't want to lie to them about her, just like he didn't want to betray her after promising to keep her condition quiet.

Haymitch fell asleep with Effie on his mind.

When he woke up the next day with a crick in his neck and the bottle rolling on the floor, it was already mid-day. The sun was glaring brightly outside and the geese were making a racket. Haymitch ambled over to the window and pulled the blinders down slightly. Squinting, he could make Katniss coming back from the woods, game in hand. She would clean up and join Peeta at the bakery. It was routine and he knew it well enough by now.

He kicked the empty bottle of whiskey aside. That was all he allowed himself nowadays - one bottle a day, at the very most. Crossing the room to the kitchen, he grumbled at the sight of the papers strewn all over the floor and the fax machine. Plutarch had given him a facsimile machine so that it was easier for him to send over documents and he must have send documents at night while he was still asleep.

He gathered the papers and glanced over them, noting the heading at the top of the document. It was the Avox Rehabilitation Program that the Council had been debating back and forth for the past two months. President Paylor and Plutarch, mostly Plutarch, had brought him in on it.

Peeta had left him a loaf of banana bread in his kitchen. The sight of it made his stomach grumbled. He grabbed a piece and picked up the phone, intending to call Plutarch. Instead, his fingers dialed someone else's number, a number he had been staring at for days.

The phone kept ringing and he was about to hang up when she answered.

"Effie Trinket speaking," she said.

"Sweetheart," he chewed on the bread.

"Oh, Haymitch, how rude," she cluck her tongue, disapprovingly. "Do swallow your food first."

"Good that you know it's me but what took you so long to answer the damn phone?"

"I just got home. I was at the doctor's."

"Why?" he took another bite from the bread. "Everything okay?"

"Yes," she answered. He could hear the clinks of spoon against a cup in the background. "Just a normal check-up to make sure everything is as it should be. The baby's healthy."

"And you?"

He placed the papers down. He would look through it later.

"My doctor said that I need to gain more weight. He's giving me a month to put on some."

Haymitch scoffed at that.

"Yeah, sweetheart, no kidding. I don't need to be a doctor to tell you that either. A little bit of fillin' out will do you some good."

"I know. I'm trying. The agency isn't too happy. The baby's healthy and all but … It's not good enough for them. Anyway, you never told me what you were doing at the Capitol when we cross paths," she was quick to change the subject. "I was very surprised to see you at the Capitol of all places, did you know?"

"Business," Haymitch answered, indulging her. If she didn't want to talk about it, fine, then he wouldn't press her.

"What kind?"

"Helping President Paylor – not my idea. Plutarch thinks it's a shame to let my mind go to waste and since I've got the time… Well, why the hell not. There's not much to do here."

"That's good that you're doing something. That's really good. So you're at the Capitol often, then?"

"Why, sweetheart, miss me already?" he teased and he wondered if he had gone too far because she was quiet all of a sudden.

He could still hear her breathing over the phone which meant she was still there.

"Said something wrong, did I?"

"No, no, you didn't," she spoke softly and he could almost see her with a small smile on her face. "You're the first familiar face I met since the war," she admitted. "I didn't know I miss it until now. I thought of you and the children often."

Haymitch rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes flitted to the papers on the table.

"I … I could visit," he suggested cautiously. "I'm at the Capitol every other month for a day or two. I ain't due to be there till a couple of weeks from now but I could… I've got some things I need to discuss with Plutarch anyway. He just sent them over documents yesterday night. Besides, the booze's great over there and the train won't be here till next week. I can use the chance to restock."

"And…?"

He clenched his jaws at the teasing tone in her voice. She would make him say it, he was sure. She wouldn't make the first move.

"You want to meet me or what?"

She laughed. "That would be lovely."

XxX

Katniss crossed her arms and frowned at him. "You  _just_  got back two weeks ago. It was last two weeks, wasn't it, Peeta?"

The boy nodded. Even he was curious now.

"So what now? You're keeping tabs when I come and go?"

"That's not what Katniss meant. We're just curious is all…" Peeta shrugged. "Everything alright at the Capitol?"

"It's the Avox situation," he told them which happened to be the truth since he did intend on meeting Plutarch to discuss the matter. "Paylor wants it to be expedited – thing's been on the table for months now and we ain't moving forward much."

What he didn't tell them was that he had been talking to Effie every day since that phone call. Except, most of the time now, it was Effie who would call him. He got a distinct feeling that she was lonely and now that they had 'reconnected' – a term he used lightly – she latched on the connection; to him, someone she knew from her past.

Their conversations centered on safe topics; the situation in the Capitol, the state in District Twelve, news on people they used to know like Annie, Finn and Johanna and in that particular instance, he was the one doing the updating since Effie was completely out of touch with them.

On his part, he learnt that she picked up knitting as a hobby. She grew very bored at the facility and devoured magazines like a hungry man would devour food. She couldn't work because being a surrogate was her job and if she intended to go out, she would have to report to the facility manager.

"Sounds like a damn prison," he had mumbled under his breath.

During the rare moments when she did talk about her pregnancy, Haymitch learnt that she was carrying a baby girl and that she found listening to her heart beat soothing and calming to her nerves. She was given a copy of the sonogram video and she admitted, reluctantly that she listened to it at night.

Haymitch was so close to telling her that she shouldn't get so attached but bit his tongue at the very last minute. He remembered her hanging up on him in tears after he said something particularly calloused – something about her diet. Where the Effie Trinket he knew would have cut him down with a scathing remark, this one was much more emotional in her pregnancy.

"Tomorrow is the day, then?"

"Yeah," he muttered gruffly. "See you tomorrow, stranger."

She laughed lightly and he figured that she must have remembered how he had called her that when he first met her at the traffic junction after six years.

"We won't be strangers anymore," she insisted. "We won't be. We've never been."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Haymitch misses her more than he realised. He did look for her that six years that she disappeared off the face of the earth, and he still felt like he owed her for her capture.
> 
> Is Effie getting a little bit attached to the baby?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There won't be an update next week because I'm going on a vacation. So the story will pick up again the week after. Now that that's settled, have fun reading this chapter!

 

**Chapter 4**

Stumbling into Effie Trinket at an unsuspecting traffic junction was one thing. Taking a train and travelling all the way to the other side of the country  _on purpose_  with a clear plan to meet her was another thing altogether.

Haymitch tapped his fingers on his knees, watching the terrains passed him by in a blur. When his fingers stopped its erratic movements, his foot picked up where it left off and bounced on the train floor. If he were to admit it, Haymitch was feeling anxious. Not because he was looking forward to meeting her but... There were six years between them.

That was six years of him mulling over his guilt; years he spent searching for her, giving up only to search for her again because he couldn't let her vanished just like that. It wasn't like Effie changed her name or did anything drastic for her to completely disappear so perhaps,  _he_  wasn't looking for her hard enough.

He had no explanation for that unless... Unless not finding her meant that he would never have to face her disappointment or her anger because  _that_ would make sense. Had this all been going on in his subconscious without him noticing? Or was it because he never wanted to admit it until now?

Haymitch pressed the heel of his hand against his temple. If there was one thing he hated, it was confronting questions like this and dealing with  _feelings_.

Effie had told him that she wasn't holding on to that anger anymore but at some point prior, she did harbour that rage over him leaving her behind. He was used to having her angry at him for ruining her schedule, for being drunk and embarrassing her but not this kind of bitterness.

Six years was a long time. Him blindsided by her pregnancy - or her surrogacy for that matter - was a testament to how much time they lost between them, how much about each other that they didn't know.

 _Pregnant and lonely_ , he corrected himself.

He thought maybe his unexpected reappearance in her life was better than nothing for him. Maybe he was convenient, maybe not. He didn't know.

That wasn't all that he didn't know. He sure as hell had no idea what to do with a pregnant Effie or why he wanted to see her at all.

 _You owe her something,_  a voice nagged at the back of his mind and Haymitch Abernathy hated owing people anything.

He decided that it was the guilt that was driving him. Nothing more, just the guilt. He left her at the mercy of her captors once so this time, he would make sure she would come out of this unscathed. He would offer whatever help he could give and once she had given birth, gotten her money and found her footing, he would be absolved of his guilt. He wouldn't owe her anything anymore. He would have done his part and he could go on with his life, not that there was anything much to his life.

There was only one problem. He didn't know the first thing about pregnancy, so he wasn't sure exactly how much help he would be.

An audible groan escaped him when he realised that he would have to deal with an emotional woman. As if Effie Trinket on her own wasn't bad enough.

He did have a knack of getting himself into sticky situations sometimes, a habit from his childhood.

When Haymitch arrived, he went off to Plutarch's office. If Effie was there to remind him about manners, she would have told him to call Plutarch first but she wasn't and Haymitch wasn't one to care much about it so when he walked into Plutarch's office to see him and Fulvia in an intimate embrace, he blinked.

"Sorry, sweetheart, business," Haymitch walked into the office, unperturbed, and sat on the chair, ignoring the scandalised look Fulvia threw his way. "Won't take long - you can continue whatever it is you're doing later."

"How rude," Fulvia pursed her lips.

Haymitch chuckled. Riling up Capitol women seems to be a hobby he picked up but Fulvia could never be as fun as Effie.

She pressed a finger at the corner of her mouth just to be sure that there were no lipstick stains, gave Plutarch a peck on his cheek and left the room.

"She finds you exasperating," Plutarch laughed.

"You know who else used to find me exasperating?" Haymitch leaned back in his chair, watching Plutarch. "Effie Trinket."

Plutarch let out a sigh and dropped on the chair across from Haymitch. "Maybe she doesn't want to be found, Haymitch. You should let it go."

He had heard this from Plutarch and Johanna countless times, and twice from Katniss, the pragmatist that they were recognized a futile effort when they see one. The only people who occasionally asked him about Effie were Annie and Peeta, the people whose optimism and hope would never have allowed him to abandon his search for her.

"Yeah, well..." Haymitch shrugged. "Say, Plutarch, how common is surrogacies 'round here?"

"Common enough. My cousin, August, he's born from a surrogate. So is Fulvia," Plutarch said and Haymitch's eyebrows shot up. "Why'd you ask? Interested in one, are you? Or are you finally," he leaned forward eagerly as if Haymitch was about to share an interesting piece of news with him, "interested in settling down with a child? I didn't know you have someone in Twelve… She can't carry a baby or … Oh! She must be about your age, yes? So her age isn't prime for ..."

"Nothin' like that," Haymitch scowled.

"So why are you asking?"

"Curious. The Avox plan...?" Haymitch switched the subject before Plutarch could get any more suspicious. "Thought I can get a look at it early instead of waiting till the next meeting."

Plutarch slid the folder to him and they spent an hour discussing the issue.

"I'll get Fulvia to make the necessary arrangements for your trip home."

"That's alright. I'll handle it this time. Might be here for a few days - got something I need to pick up for the kids back home."

Plutarch shot him a look but otherwise, he didn't comment on the oddity of it.

With the meeting done, Haymitch retraced the steps he took a few weeks ago, walking down the streets and crossing unfamiliar roads until he saw the nondescript building tucked in a corner.

Haymitch saw her before she saw him. Effie was waiting near the traffic junction where they met before, sitting on a nearby bench. She seemed at odds with herself, nothing like the self-assured person he knew, jittery even.

He remained where he was, a safe distance away.

He could turn around. It still wasn't too late. He could crash at Plutarch's place while Fulvia arrange for a train ticket home and he could take that train, be back in Distrct Twelve by this time tomorrow.

Effie would call, of course, and he could say that something came up. There was no need for him to deal with her, pregnant or not. He could forget about it; forget ever bumping into her, forget that she was carrying or that the aftermath of the war didn't grant her the peace Katniss, Peeta and himself had somehow managed to find among the ruined rubbles of District Twelve.

That was what alcohol was for – to forget. It wouldn't be difficult to put all of this away; him in Twelve and she in the Capitol.

There was no need for this. He wasn't required to meet her and ….  _Fuck_ ,  _what am I supposed to be doing with her anyway?_

Haymitch walked away. One step and then another. He could send money. He had more than enough from his years as a Victor and now that he had a 'job' advising President Paylor.

_She needs more than money. She's alone._

"Dammit," he cursed loudly, ignoring the startled glances from the passers-by.

He turned around, walking back towards the end of the street. He wished his conscience could take a hike for once.

Effie was still there waiting for him, craning her neck this way and that, paying careful attention to people who walked passed her, studying their faces and looking away when it wasn't him.

Haymitch was well aware that he was late by ten minutes and Effie, pregnant or not, still retained some aspect of herself which the war could not erode. Punctuality was still important to her.

He let the minute ticked passed, still debating on the sidewalk when he saw her stood up and walked over to one of the public pay phones nearby. She slotted a coin in and pressed the receiver to her ears, waiting for someone on the other end to answer. He already knew who she was calling. She wouldn't get an answer. He was here, not at his house.

Walking away from the booth, Effie gave one last sweeping glance at the street. Her shoulders drooped slightly and her face had taken on a dejected expression but she was already crossing the road back towards the apartment building.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," he swore. Gritting his teeth in steely determination, he came out from where he was hiding and went up to her. "Effie! Hey, sweetheart, wait!"

She turned and her face lighted up at the sight of him, the disappointment vanished in a flash.

"Haymitch," she breathed a sigh of relief. "I thought… I thought you were not going to turn up. I was waiting near the junction just like we agreed. I tried to call and see if – You're late."

He scoffed at the rebuke but there was a measure of relief in it. The old Effie was still there.

"Yeah, sorry. Plutarch," he said as if that should explain his tardiness.

"No matter," she waved his half-decent apologies away. "You're here now. So... Well… Hello, I supposed," she gave him a cautious smile and held out her hand.

"Hello?" he raised an eyebrow. "What's the matter with you?"

"People greet each other with a 'hello', Haymitch."

"Do they?" he teased. "'Cause I don't remember you greeting me like that ever. You were always screeching 'bout something or the other in my ear.  _Up, up, up,_ " he mimicked her, " _get up, Haymitch!_  Not even a good morning."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "I did say hello to you the first time we met at the Justice Building. I don't blame you if you can't remember. You were drunk as I recalled and nearly threw up on me if it wasn't for the Mayor."

"Ah," he chuckled. "I'm mostly sober right now so I ain't gonna throw up. See, sweetheart, we're off to a good start already."

The look she was giving him could only be described as fondness. Haymitch pulled on the collar of his shirt, uncomfortable with it.

"I like second chances," she told him quietly, a smile on playing on her lips.

It startled him.  _Second chances…_  He filed that away. He would examine what it meant and how he felt about that later.

"Yeah, so, what now?" he asked. "Should we head back to your apartment instead of standing around on the sidewalk or …."

"Oh no, no, let's not go to my apartment. I spend far too much time in it. I think I am going crazy. Take me out, Haymitch, please."

He tilted his head to the left, surprised at her request.

"I've already informed the facility manager that I will be out today, so that's settled. I am bored of being at the place. I'm bored of walking around these streets on my own. You're here and I was thinking that we could… We could go somewhere."

"You have to tell people where you're going?" he asked.

"Well, no, not exactly. I just have to let them know that I'll be out and that I'll be back before ten tonight."

"You have a curfew?"

His tone must have conveyed how ridiculous he thought it was because Effie flushed and was quick to tell him that it was for the safety of the baby in the womb that she be well-rested.

"I don't think – "

"Do you know what I want?" Effie interrupted.

She walked ahead and glanced back once to see if he was following. He was. It wasn't like he walked all the way here to be left on the sidewalk alone.

"I want hot, greasy bacon. I know – how surprising, isn't it? I had to watch my figure back then and I know being pregnant isn't a reason to let myself go but once in a while… I really want it. I can taste it on my tongue whenever I close my eyes. I've been thinking about it all week even! It's terrible."

"So why didn't you just eat the damn thing when you first wanted it?"

She laughed as if he had just made a funny a joke.

"Don't be silly, Haymitch. I can't have that back at the facility. They monitor food consumption; the quantity, the quality. It's like…" she frowned. "It's like being in District Thirteen again, sometimes. Oh! Oh! Chocolate covered strawberries…. How delicious. I think I will have that, too."

They ended up at a diner a few blocks away from where she lived. She ordered what she wanted with desserts to go along and he watched her eat with amusement. She made little noises of satisfaction when she first bit into the bacon and closed her eyes to savour the taste.

"It feels odd to be the only one eating and you watching me like that. Are you sure you don't want anything?" she asked.

"I think I'm good," he insisted but ordered himself a drink.

"How are the children?"

"They're doing fine," he told her. "Peeta's got his bakery running – told you about that, didn't I? Katniss helps out when she feels like it. Otherwise, she hunts. Spend most morning in the forest."

"You?"

"Me?" he asked and raised the glass in a mock salute. "I drink and wait for the next train. Knitting's going good?"

"Yes," she nodded. "I made myself a pair of mittens for the winter. I'm thinking of making a matching pair for the baby."

"Don't," he mumbled. "Don't."

She pretended that she hadn't heard him. Instead, she placed her cutleries carefully and fished a book from her bag. "I learnt from this book – and my doctor confirmed the same – that she can hear my voice. She might even recognize it."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yes," she smiled. Again, she retrieved something from her bag and slid it over to him "Look, this is my baby girl."

She tapped the sonogram at a clump of something white and Haymitch could just make out the shape of a head.

He ordered another drink and gulped it down, feeling sick to his stomach all of a sudden. "She's not yours, Effie," he blurted that out.

She had to know that. She desperately needed the reminder and since he was the only one she was talking to, it fell on him.

Effie gasped and gaped at him. She snapped her mouth shut, snatched the sonogram away and very carefully kept it back in her bag along with the book.

"I'm done eating," she pushed the plate away and stood up, walking away from their booth and out of the diner.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haymitch is starting to dig into this whole surrogacy business. :) What do you think of that meeting with Effie?


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said I'll update every Saturday but I managed to write a few chapters since i got back from Bali so here we go :)

 

** Chapter 5 **

Haymitch walked her back to her apartment.

After she walked out on him, he had strongly considered just leaving for the train station but Effie had stopped abruptly. She had turned around and looked at him thoughtfully before walking back to the diner for him.

With a sigh, he tossed some coins on the table for their meal and met her halfway at the walkway outside.

"I'm sorry. That was very rude of me," she bit her bottom lip. "You – You came all the way out of here and I shouldn't… I'm usually not this emotional but – "

That was when he changed his mind.

"It's fine," he grumbled under his breath.

The relief she felt was obvious for him to see. They walked back to her apartment with Effie sticking close to him, her hand brushing against his occasionally. When people walked too close to her, she pressed herself to him, her arms against his, seeking his safety or his comfort most likely and he could hear her breath hitched audibly.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes," she nodded.

The city wasn't the same as it once was. It was different now and Effie talked constantly, telling him about the changes in the Capitol. He already knew more or less of what she was telling him but Haymitch let her talk. It felt like she needed it.

"I haven't seen much of the Capitol except for around here where I live," she told him. 'Most of it, I read from the news."

"You have a lot of time on your hand. You should go see the rest of the city."

"Is it safe?" she stared up at him.

The question seemed odd to his ears but he didn't dwell too much on it. "'Course it is."

"I will ask Omana then."

"Who?"

"Oh, she's the officer in-charge of my floor. She takes care of our welfare and well-being."

"So she tells you where you can and cannot go and what you can do?"

Effie's eyes darted away from him. "Well… It doesn't sound at all…. It doesn't matter. Did you know we get real weathers here ever since the war? It's the most marvelous of things. The synthetic weather system was destroyed during the invasion and it was never of any importance for it to be repaired so this heat we're currently feeling, it's all real."

Haymitch nodded, pretending to be interested but something was nagging at the back of his mind. Something that made his stomach churned.

"I do like it when it snows. I don't really enjoy the cold but I do appreciate the beauty."

Haymitch snorted. "The snow here is nothing compared to Twelve."

"What is it like there?" Effie asked, genuinely curious now.

"Colder." He shrugged then. "You should see Twelve covered in snow for yourself. It's white everywhere you look."

He tried not to think of how that might sound like. He tried not to think of the fact that he had just invited her home or that it might be too soon considering they had only recently tried a tentative hand at reconciling their differences. He tried to shove aside the fact that as the idea began to take hold in his mind, he realized, he wouldn't mind having Effie in Twelve.

He pushed away the thought that everyone except for her had visited Twelve at some point; Annie, Finn and Johanna, even Beetee and Plutarch. Effie had never set foot in Twelve since the war and she had been the only one missing from the dinners they all had together in District Twelve whenever Johanna brought Annie and Finn for a visit. He thought of Finn who knew his Aunt Effie because Annie and the rest of them told him about her and he thought of Effie who had never met Finn.

He tried to pretend as if her answer wouldn't matter to him one way or another.

Effie came to an abrupt halt the moment the question left his lips and so did he when he realized that she wasn't walking beside him anymore. Haymitch glanced over his shoulder, turning his body slightly to face her. The look on her face told him that she knew he was extending something to her, a chance for her to reconnect with Peeta and Katniss in District Twelve.

"What's the matter?"

"N - Nothing," she forced a smile on her lips and shook her head. "I would like to see Twelve during the winter. From what you told me, I think Twelve has changed as much as the Capitol and I'd like … Perhaps I can visit Twelve in four months' time. Will I be safe there?"

There it was again, the question about her safety except this time, he thought it had something to do with her pregnancy. His gaze fell to her stomach and her hand fluttered over it protectively.

"Yeah," he nodded. "Yeah, after you give birth, sure, might be better. You don't want the kids to see you pregnant after all, yeah?"

"It's – It's not that," she bit her lip. He tilted his head because he was sure she had been very adamant that he kept the pregnancy from Katniss and Peeta. "Well, it's that and … I can't leave."

Haymitch frowned. "Sure you can. Inter-districts travels are allowed, sweetheart. I'm here, aren't I?"

" _I_  can't leave. None of us here can," she gestured at the apartment building. "As long as I'm carrying, I'll have to stay here for them to monitor us."

He stared and blinked at her.

"You can't leave the city. You've got someone to tell you where you can go. You know what I'm thinking? That place you're in sounds like a damn prison. They tagging you or something?" he chuckled. "Got a tracker on you?"

"Language," she chided him but Haymitch knew he had said something wrong because even as she was rebuking him for his language, she had taken a step away from him, eyes wide and staring at the floor.

"I didn't mean it," he mumbled.

"I'm not in prison anymore," she whispered, clutching at her wrists and feeling for the cuffs that were no longer there. "I'm not a prisoner. I'm free."

Haymitch took a step closer to her only to have her move away from him. He stopped where he was.

"Sweetheart, look... listen," he rubbed his cheek, staring at her uncertainly.

Back home, he knew very well how to deal with Katniss' nightmares and Peeta's episodes but not with Effie. He had not been there since during most of her healing process and he had no grasp on what would calm her. It was easy with Peeta. There was a pattern to it. He would pull a chair to the corner of the room and wait until the boy stopped rocking, until the haze had lifted from his eyes. Peeta would ask after Katniss. It was his job to assure him that she was safe in another part of the house and that he had not hurt her, and Peeta would recite old family recipes to himself. Haymitch would sit and listen. He listened so much he had by now, memorised the ingredients and the steps to make cheese buns and cupcakes.

"You're wrong. I'm not in prison. I am safe there," she gestured at the building.

"You're right. You're not in prison. You're safe," he assured her. "Or as safe as I think you are," he muttered the last part quietly.

"What does that mean?"

"I don't like this facility you're staying in," he shrugged. "Something's off and my gut instinct is never wrong."

"You're being paranoid."

He scoffed. He wasn't the one to keep asking after his own safety.

"I feel safe there and … I - I have nowhere else to go," she whispered. "I just have to do everything they tell me and I'll be fine. The rules are simple enough. I signed a contract with them and I'm bound by -"

"Yeah, I know," he touched her elbow briefly and when she didn't flinch from his touch he guided her to the entrance of the building and up to the small apartment she called home.

Haymitch didn't wait for her to show him the sofa. He walked over and flopped down on it while she went over to the phone to inform Omana that she was back.

Haymitch waited until she got off the phone before he asked, "What does the contract say? The one you signed with them."

"A standard surrogacy contract," Effie told him. "I will be responsible for my health and that of my baby - "

"Not yours," he told her again, looking at her straight. He refused to shy away from the subject. He refused to sugarcoat anything to spare her feelings because she needed to realise the truth – that baby wasn't hers.

Effie pursed her lips. "I'll give birth to  _the_  baby and make sure that to the best of my ability, the baby's healthy."

"Isn't that out of your control?"

"Not really. There are things that a mother does that could harm a baby. Alcohol and smoking tops the list."

"Fine, then what?"

"They will take her away. Give her to the biological parents," there was a catch in her voice when she said that and she tore her eyes away from him, as if he couldn't already see that it was hurting her. "I will be paid then for carrying it to term and giving birth to it."

"That's not all, yeah? What else are you giving up?"

"All … All my rights to the baby. All my parental rights. I will have no legal claim on her. I don't get to see her, visit her or watch her grow."

Haymitch sighed heavily. "You know what the problem is, don't you, sweetheart? You always get attached.  _Always_. I've seen it with the tributes you escorted and I'm seein' it now."

"I can't - " she heaved a breath. "I can't control how I feel. You can't - "

"You're going to stop knitting whatever you're knitting for that baby. You're going to stop referring to it as  _'my baby'._ It's not yours and it will  _never_  be yours. You don't want to hear it? Too bad, sweetheart, 'cause that's the truth. You need to listen to me. Look at me, Effie."

There was something in his voice that compelled her to look up.

"You cannot get attached to that baby."

"I know. Don't you think I know that? Sometimes … Sometimes I'm just…" she gestured helplessly. "I forgot how brutally honest you can be, Haymitch."

"You can't lose perspective. If you do, when the time comes, it'll break you."

The Capitol broke her once and if she wasn't careful, this could very well shatter her. She couldn't see it yet but he could, and he was trying to stop that from happening _._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you think Haymitch telling her that will work? Leave a review.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

His house was quiet. There were no phone calls from her for two consecutive days after he returned and he figured that she was angry with him. What he told her was, admittedly, a little difficult to swallow.

On the third day, Haymitch sat on the sofa, a bottle in hand, willing the phone to ring. It was pathetic, he thought, how he measured time by the ringing of his phone. Ten at night. That would be when Effie would usually call.

 _You've lost her once_ , he reminded himself. He didn't want to spend another six years searching for her again so he caved in. He shuffled to the phone and called her.

"Busy or angry?" he asked the moment she picked up.

"I thought about what you said – I needed time to think. You're right," she told him. "I - I shouldn't get attached."

"I'm always right, sweetheart."

His voice was gruff and rough but there was relief in it at finally hearing her voice.

"A little humility would do you some good, Haymitch."

He could picture the small smile playing on her lips as she said it; picture her twirling the cord between her fingers.

"It's not such an easy thing. I - She's so alive inside of me. I feel every move she makes."

"Try," he insisted.

Haymitch met her a few more times after the first meeting, making trips to the Capitol even when it was not time for the monthly meetings with Plutarch and President Paylor. Katniss and Peeta were growing suspicious and they were beginning to ask him questions. Not only did they notice the visits, they noticed that he was always on the phone at a specific time every night. Each time they ask what he was up to, he would tell them the same thing - Avox Rehabilitation Program.

Plutarch chose to interpret his frequent visits as his enthusiasm to help the avoxes. Haymitch did nothing to dissuade him of the notion and Plutarch had no cause to be suspicious because there was progress where the program was concern.

What Plutarch didn't know was that Effie was helping him. She knew avoxes, a fact that surprised Haymitch tremendously but they had six years apart and there were still things she had not told him. She knew those that still worked in sanitation and cleaned the streets, and those that had lost jobs since the war. She brought Haymitch to them and helped them get registered so that they could receive the government's help.

Just like the first time he met her, Haymitch brought Effie out each time he was at the Capitol. It was during their walks that Haymitch noticed how her hand would flutter to her stomach as a protective gesture or to feel the baby move, and each time that happen, he would grab her wrist and place her hand back at her sides.

"Don't," he would tell her.

Effie found a solution to that problem rather quickly. She had taken to treading their fingers together, walking hand in hand with him. The first time it happened, he had stiffened under her touch. She had let go of his hand then, embarrassed and apologetic, and her hand was back on her stomach to quell the nervousness.

It was him then who offered, extending his hand out to her, palm up. She seemed uncertain, looking up at him and when he gave a curt nod, she laced their fingers together. He let her hold onto his hand, feeling the warmth and the smooth skin of her palm.

It was natural the way his thumb would rub soothing circles on her knuckle. Effie walked with a spring in her steps and a smile on her face, and he thought, this was the only time he had seen her smile. She was never like this when it was time for him to send her home.

They would always end up at the same diner. The owner and the employees there already knew them by now and had long memorised their orders. They would discuss work over food and drinks or Effie would talk to him about her days and her weeks. She never mentioned the facility much and she avoided talking about her pregnancy which Haymitch took as a good sign. Maybe if they were to pretend the baby didn't exist, it would be easier to part with it when the time came. No attachment.

"Why do you keep geese, Haymitch?" she asked out of the blue.

He paused. He had never really thought about it. He found a pair two weeks after returning back to Twelve and they just remained with him ever since.

"For the noise. The house's too quiet and it gets me thinking," he shrugged. "You gained weight yet?"

"I have, yes," she nodded. "My doctor is satisfied with it but they're changing my vitamins to include more iron. I tire easily."

"You don't have to help me," he gestured at the papers in front of him.

"Oh, I want to. It keeps me occupied."

There was a stretch of silence. The only sound was her fork hitting the plate lightly as she scooped up scrambled eggs.

"So your breasts…" he trailed off, "… they're bigger because you gained weight or – "

"Haymitch!" Effie exclaimed. She looked affronted but the blush had spread across her cheeks. "You shouldn't be looking!"

He smirked.

"It's right there," he pointed to her chest. "If you don't want me lookin' then don't wear somethin' that shows off your cleavage."

She shook her head at him but put the cardigan she had discarded earlier back on. He was sorry to see the sight gone.

"It's heavy," she lamented after a while.

"What is?"

"My breasts. It aches and it's very sensitive to touch."

Haymitch's eyes fluttered close and he let out a breath. "You're putting thoughts in my head. How sensitive? Because -"

"Oh, hush," she pursed her lips. "I'm trying to have a moment here with you and share things like friends do. Must you always be so crude?"

 _Friends._  That was good. That was a good sign. It was a step up from being strangers.

"Can't help it," he chuckled. "Makes your life interesting, no? Besides, you look better… fuller, rounder."

"A compliment that sounds so very insulting at the same time. A specialty of yours, isn't it, Haymitch?"

There was something in the depth of her blue eyes that made him paused; a burning gaze that made her irises appeared darker. Effie licked her lips then and looked away.

When he felt her moved to cross her legs under the table, he raised an eyebrow and he couldn't help teasing her. "I heard women are more willing to have sex when they're pregnant... They're hornier or somethin'?"

"If you're asking me to sleep with you, then you're doing a poor job of it," she pressed her lips together but her cheeks were still tinged red.

"Just curious," he laughed but his thoughts were already taking him someplace else.

He wondered how long it had been for her because it had been too long for him, and just like that, flashes of their past fleeted through his mind.

He remembered Effie writhing under him, nail scratching his back, eyes closed and mouth opened in pleasure. He remembered angry kisses and desperate wandering hands. He remembered pinning her to his bed with his body, burying himself deep inside of her with his eyes squeezed shut to rid himself of the image of his male tribute impaled with a spear. He remembered her on top of him, fucking herself on him in a desperate attempt not to feel the despair of losing another tribute. He remembered the woman who knew what she wanted and knew exactly how to get it from him. He remembered her hand on his, teaching and guiding him on how she liked to be touched.

And suddenly, she wasn't the only one who needed to cross their legs. He stared at her, wondering just how light he needed to touch her in this state she was in to bring her over the edge.

Which other part of her had become sensitive to touch? He was itching to find out but this wasn't the same Effie that -

"Haymitch. Haymitch!"

"What?" he cleared his throat, shifting in his seat slightly and was glad for the table that hid his lower body from her view.

"You weren't paying attention to me," she accused him.

"Yeah, 'course not. You have the tendency to keep on talkin' even when -"

"Are you okay?" she peered at him. "You seemed flushed."

She reached out across the table, her palm warm on his cheek and he jolted away from her touch, surprised by it.

"I'm fine."

He wasn't prepared for her gentle caresses but by the time he realised he didn't mind, she had already retracted her hand.

XxX

After insisting multiple times that it wasn't charity, Haymitch bought her a radio with a music player during his previous visit simply because it meant she could listen to something else other than her own voice. It also meant he would get some peace while he was at her apartment. If he didn't like to hear her talk, he could simply just leave as Effie had pointed and he could, he knew that, but he wanted to stay for as long as it was possible. He chose not to dwell or think too much about what it all meant the fact that  _he_  wanted to spend time with her.

Peeta and Katniss tried hard to make sure he had company by inviting him over to lunch or dinner but as much as he loved those kids, they weren't Effie. There was something different about being with Effie, like he had met his equal. It was calming and exhilarating at the same time.

Soft music was playing in the background and Effie was curled on the sofa knitting. After he had asked her to abandon the dress she was knitting for the baby, she had taken on another project. She insisted on knitting him a sweater for the upcoming winter. It would be ugly, he knew that without a shred of doubt and he had even told her the same.

"You'll wear it," she had pointed the needle in his direction. "When it's ready, you'll put it on."

"Make me," he leveled his gaze with her as she narrowed her eyes at him.

Haymitch sipped on his coffee. He watched her work with a look of intense concentration on her face. Effie had been complaining about the sleeves for the past fifteen minutes which drove him to walk over to the radio and twist the knob, turning the volume up to drown her voice. She glared at him, he smirked.

The sharp knock on her door startled them both. He turned towards her, eyebrows raised, a silent question if she was expecting a guest but a shake of her head told him otherwise. She stood up and peered at the keyhole. Her entire demeanour changed. She tensed suddenly and turned around abruptly to face him, her face a mask of worry.

"Who's outside?" he frowned.

"Omana," she answered. "You... You should... Hold on a minute," she raised her voice slightly after another knock.

"Are you...  _afraid_  of her?" he asked with a hint of incredulity, shock even because the idea itself was ridiculous.

"Don't be absurd," she clicked her tongue, perhaps a little too defensively for it to be believable. "I should have told her... and now..." she muttered under her breath, "but she never visits when you're around. She didn't have to - "

"Effs, what - "

"Just let me do the talking," she snapped at him and he frowned at the tone of her voice suddenly reminded of the woman he first met at the traffic junction – angry and short tempered.

She shot him an apologetic look before opening the door.

Omana Grimm was a no-nonsense woman. She stood as tall as Effie, shorter if it weren't for the heels she was wearing, and had a head full of thick red hair tied into a tight ponytail. Her eyes swept over the room, taking in the knitting apparatus, the ball of yarns on the floor, the cups of coffee and finally to Haymitch who was blocking her view of Effie partially with his body.

Omana offered a tight lipped smiled, walked over to the radio just as Haymitch had done moments ago and turned it off as if the music coming from it was offending to the ears.

"Effie, you didn't tell me you have a guest."

"I – Yes, he's just leaving," Effie said except her actions were contradictory in itself. She had stepped closer to him.

"We have not been introduced yet. You know," Omana tapped her chin with a finger, "I have heard of you entertaining someone as of late. I was surprised, naturally, especially since I found this out not from you but from someone else. I've been curious ever since and my, I didn't know it was Haymitch Abernathy."

"Nothin' wrong with that, is there?" Haymitch asked. "Didn't see any sign that says no guest allowed."

She was still smiling but her eyes had taken on a dangerous glint at the challenge to her authority. He suspected that she didn't get a lot of those around here.

"Nothing wrong, of course, but we certainly need to be informed. You are aware of this policy, don't you, Effie?"

"Yes," Effie nodded. "Haymitch is just leaving. You are, aren't you? You have a train to catch."

She nudged him towards the door and chasing a guest out of her house in this manner was something the Effie he knew would never do.

"Manners, sweetheart," he muttered loud enough for Effie to hear. Her eyes widened and she dropped her hands, ceasing her efforts to subtly get him to leave.

"Why wasn't I informed, Effie?" Omana queried.

"Why do you need to know who she's got over at her place?" Haymitch frowned.

"For her safety and the baby's, of course. Especially the baby. Now, how many times have you been here, Mr. Abernathy?"

"Please," Effie took a step towards her. "He's just a friend."

"We will determine that," Omana said curtly. "You understand the consequences this will have on your weekly allowance, yes?"

"Hold on a second," Haymitch interrupted. "What the fuck does it mean  _you_  will determine if I'm her friend?"

"Please mind your language," Effie hissed.

Haymitch glared at her. For weeks he had a feeling about this place and now that he had finally met the officer in-charge of Effie's case, he liked this place even less.

"You really shouldn't associate yourself with people with such brash attitude," Omana chided. "Swearing and cursing? The baby can  _hear_. We sent you for courses so you will know all these things. Do I need to send you for another?"

"I – I know. Haymitch didn't mean it. Like I said, he's leaving."

"What the fuck is the matter with you?" Haymitch reached out to grab her arm but Effie sidestepped him. Her compliance was frustrating him. "This isn't you, Effie."

"Please leave," she spoke quietly.

"I won't. Not until you explain to me what the hell is going on here."

"Haymitch, please just leave," she tried again. "They will ask you questions and … "

"You will come with me, Mr. Abernathy," Omana beckoned; an order, not a request. "We should get acquainted."

"Fine, wait outside. I'll join you in a minute," he jerked his head out at the corridor.  _He_  wasn't going to play by her rules. Omana pursed her lips, clearly displeased to be ordered around but she left, knowing it was better than to argue further.

Effie let out a breath once she was gone and closed the distance between them, clutching to his arm like someone who was drowning.

"I'm sorry," she told him earnestly. "I didn't mean to put you in a spot. I didn't mean… I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Hey, sweetheart, it's okay."

Effie seemed so lost at that moment that Haymitch crossed the line and broke all the tentative, careful touches they shared so far to pull her into his arms. She clung to him, pressing her face into his chest.

"I probably won't see you again now."

Her words were muffled but he picked it up, nonetheless.

"What do you mean?"

"They never come back. Everyone here, they've lost friends from their lives. We only have each other. I'm sorry, Haymitch, I should have never brought you here. I got careless," she laughed bitterly.

"We should have just… Haymitch, I don't want to lose you," she admitted quietly.

He stared at her long and hard. With a gentle squeeze of her arm, he said, "I'll come back."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dramatic drum roll* what do you think is happening? Will Haymitch come back? Leave a review :)
> 
> Just another announcement, there will not be an update next Saturday because I will be going on another vacation. The next update will most likely be in 2016. So, happy holidays, hayffie shippers! Merry Christmas & Happy 2016! :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Haymitch had never been subtle. His annoyance was plain to see in the way he clenched his jaws, the slight downturn of his lips and the crinkles on the corners of his eyes. He wasted no time in going straight to the subject either.

"So what's this about?"

Omana Grimm crossed her legs and studied him. Haymitch stared, unblinking.

"There are certain rules and policies governing this facility. They are nothing to be worried about. They are there to ensure that everything runs smoothly. The health of our surrogates and the babies they deliver are of utmost important to us, hence the rules. I would just need to ask you a few questions."

"Get on with it," Haymitch said.

"Very well – what is the nature of your relationship with Effie Trinket?"

Haymitch did not immediately answer that question. He tilted his head, eyebrows raised. Omana waited but it wasn't an answer that Haymitch gave.

"How's that any of your concern?"

"Please answer the question."

 _If only it was that easy,_ Haymitch mused. Who was Effie Trinket to him? There were years between them, years when their relationship shifted and changed.

"She's a… friend," Haymitch answered, settling for the safest. After all, wasn't that what Effie had told the officer earlier?

"And are you having sexual intercourse with her and if so, are you suffering from any sexually transmitted disease?"

That question came out of the blue that Haymitch started. He drummed his fingers against the arm rest. "What?" he asked, keeping his voice low.

"Sexually transmitted diseases, Haymitch," Omana glanced up at him briefly to see if he was paying attention to her. "HIV, Herpes, Gonorrhoea **– "**

"I know what they are," he spat. "What I want to know is why are you asking me these questions?"

"It is important."

"Important for what? You ain't a doctor. You shouldn't be asking people that sort of question."

"Are you refusing to answer the question because there is something you want to hide?

"Listen here," Haymitch leaned forward in his seat. "I'm not answering any more of your fucking questions until you tell me what is going on. Why is that woman out there," he jabbed his finger towards the door, "acting afraid. That's not the Effie I know and if I find out there's something not right going on here… Well, let's just say, I know people."

Something flickered in Omana's eyes. She wasn't the director of this facility which meant that there was someone higher up that she answered to. It would be easier to get answers from her than someone else for now.

"I've told you earlier. Our main concern is the health of our surrogates and the babies they're carrying. We have a holistic approached to it. We not only ensure their physical well-being, we also strive to seek a balance to their emotional, psychological and social well-being. For that to happen, we keep track of everyone's social circle here. If they have guests, that is fine, but their guests have to be registered and submitted for questioning. From there, we would be able to determine if the guests are fit to continue the social relation with our surrogates."

"That's a fuckin' joke, yeah?"

"I will have you know that that sort of language will not gain you any favours. I suggest you cease immediately. Now, as I was saying, if they are sexually active, we would need to know that too, _especially_ if they are sexually active."

"And why's that?" Haymitch challenged. "All these holistic health concern is bullshit. It's none of your business what they're up to."

"Is it precisely our business – this is a business enterprise. Our clients came to us seeking a solution to their problems. They came to us for a dose of happiness in the form of a child, they came to us seeking to complete their family. We aim to provide it to them and we aim to only give the best service."

"Only the best service?" Haymitch snorted. "What happens then if you find out the child has birth defect or health problems? You terminate the pregnancy? You commit infanticide?"

"Exactly, Haymitch. We want to prevent that. For the baby to be healthy, strict measures have to be put in place. Our agents' duties are simple really; carry the baby to term and give birth to a healthy baby."

"Agents… They're people not just a breeding machine."

"As compared to other companies, we have a very high success rate and we would like to keep it as such. Effie Trinket, especially, is very valuable to us."

He had been thinking about the companies she was talking about, wondering how many companies there were until he heard Effie's name.

"Valuable?" he narrowed his eyes. " _Valuable?_ Why's that? And I suggest you choose your words very carefully."

He thought he knew why. Effie Trinket, former escort and ally to the Mockingjay. That would make for a good campaign and advertisement. Effie had said something about their identities being confidential but confidentiality agreements could be breached at any given time and this company had no reason to hide Effie's identity if it meant they could benefit from it. Wouldn't that be quite a topic at parties - having Effie Trinket carrying their child?

Haymitch saw exactly the moment when Omana realized she might have said too much, that she had let slipped something because her eyes widened slightly, shifting uncomfortably in her seat.

"We are getting out of topic," she told him sternly, an attempt at gaining control of the conversation. "Diseases can be transmitted sexually and you have to bear in mind that these agents – these surrogates – are carrying babies that belonged to someone else, to a paying client. It will be highly irresponsible of them to infect the baby with diseases just because they cannot control their sexual urges or because they lapse judgment in choosing the right _friends_."

"Unbelievable," Haymitch chuckled in disbelief. "What happens if they break the rules?"

"There are severe consequences in place."

"Yeah? Like not getting paid when there's a miscarriage?"

"Yes."

"That's something out of their control, don't you think?" he asked. "You mentioned weekly allowances earlier with Effie. What's that about?"

Omana sighed impatiently.

"I am giving more information than I am getting from you. I don't have to tell you how things work here. Those are internal and you, unfortunately, are an outsider."

"Do you remember me telling you that I know people? You know who I can get with a single, simple phone call?" Haymitch asked. "The President – the Rebellion's given us a chance to get to know each other quite well."

"We cut off weekly allowances for any transgression," Omana answered, clearly unhappy by his threats. "Failing to report your visit and presence in the facility amounts to one of them. Back to my question earlier, why would she not register you unless she has something to hide from us? Again, please answer the question. Are you having sexual intercourse with her?"

"No."

"Have you had sexual intercourse with her?"

Haymitch frowned.

"I will take that as a yes," Omana smirked at him. "Are you planning or intending to start any sexual relation with her?"

"No," he gritted his teeth.

"What is the purpose of your meetings with her?"

"Can't meet a friend to catch up?" Haymitch mocked.

"Not if it places undue stress on her."

"This whole place is fucking insane. _Your_ company is making her crazy and every one of those women, I bet."

"Yet here they are…"

"They're desperate that's what's makin' them stay."

"You are too volatile, too brash, too… angry," Omana observed. "I would have to ask you to end these meetings with her immediately. She will not be allowed to see you any further. We don't need the baby to pick up such language. The parents would not appreciate it and I don't need complains."

"Do you take me for an idiot? I may not know much about lookin' after a kid but I sure as hell know that the upbringing plays a part. Doesn't matter if you lock Effie up in a sterile room and she only listens to some fucking lullaby all day long. That baby's gonna go to school one day and she's gonna pick up words, some pleasant and some not. Are you sure you're certified to run this business 'cause it looks like you know nothing 'bout children."

Omana folded her hands and smiled at him.

"We have several happy clients. I can assure you, whatever methods we employ, it guarantees success and I will not have you tarnishing our reputation. You are free to leave. I will inform the security of your status and you will not be in into this building in the future. Should Effie need a stroll, she will have company."

"You're not locking her in – "

"I said nothing about locking her in. We have never – "

"You're controlling everything. This isn't a prison. I'm taking her away. I can take her back here for her check-up or whatever, and she can deliver the baby when the time comes but that's it, she's not staying here."

"And where will you be taking her?"

"District Twelve."

"Preposterous," Omana objected. "The parents of the child she's carrying would want to monitor her like they have been doing – "

"What?"

"It doesn't matter. If you ask her, she'll tell you she's not going to leave."

"You want to bet?"

His only answer was her unwavering smile. It unnerved him.

XxX

Effie was curled on her sofa, the music still playing softly in the background when he entered. She released a breath in relief when she saw him.

"You're back. They let you back," she wound her arms around his neck and hugged him close. "I was so worried I wouldn't see you again."

"We're going. I'm takin' you with me," Haymitch said.

"What? Why?"

"I don't like this place. Something's going on and while I figure that out, I ain't having you stay here any longer. Pack your things."

"I can't leave, Haymitch."

"Sure you can," he told her earnestly as he moved towards her bedroom. At seven months, Effie was slower. By the time she entered the bedroom Haymitch was already pulling maternity dresses from the hangers and dumping them on the bed. "Pack those. Put it in a bag and anything else you want to bring with you."

"Haymitch, stop," she tugged on his arm. "Stop this! I don't _want_ to leave."

He dropped the dress he was holding and it pooled on the floor. Effie glanced down at it and glared at him but that was the least of his worries.

"What's the matter with you?" he asked. "Fine, if you don't want to go to Twelve with me then that's fine. You don't want the kids to see you like this, right?" his eyes shifted to the swell of her stomach. "I'll find us a place to stay 'round here. Plutarch's got an apartment I'm sure he wouldn't mind me renting or you can stay with Annie and her kid. They'd love to have you. Anything's better than here."

"I want to stay here."

"Why?" he demanded. He could feel his patience slowly abandoning him. There was a sense of urgency for him to get her away. "This whole place is crazy. You have to know that Effie."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, raising her eyes to meet him. "I think you should go."

"You're – You want _me_ to go? If I leave, they wouldn't let you see me again, you understand? They wouldn't let me here. I can't do that, sweetheart, I won't. I've got to make sure you're okay. I've got to… I just got you back," he said, desperate for her to understand.

"Oh, Haymitch," she sighed. Effie slid her hand against his cheek. She was standing in front of him. "I can't leave," she whispered.

Her breath was warm against his cheek and she was so close. He didn't know what he was doing, leaning forward as she tilted her chin up. Her free hand was on his chest, fingers curling around his shirt and her lips brushed lightly against his.

"Don't," he warned, jerking his head back. "Don't kiss me when you're going to push me away."

She blinked before she let her hands fall. Effie stepped away from him. "I will miss you when you're gone but perhaps after I have delivered, we can see each other again?" she asked hopefully. "We can, can't we?"

"Why do you want to stay here so much? You answer me that, sweetheart. If it's a good answer then I'll leave but you tell me why."

He had to know. He needed to know why she was so adamant on staying. There were still a few more months before she delivered and he didn't want to leave her behind _again_.

"It's safe here," she told him. "I have a bed to sleep in. I have clothes and food. They told me it's not safe outside of here. They told me it's dangerous. People hate me, I know they do. It's not safe for me. If I go out on my own, I never go far. The furthest I went was with you to the diner."

It was at that moment that it occurred to Haymitch that something was seriously wrong, that it could be worse than he thought.

Still, he tried to reason with her and reached out to her.

"You told me once this was temporary. You can't stay here forever. What happened to finding your footing? Because that's what you told me this surrogacy was for? Did you lie to me?"

"No!" she cried, appalled at the accusation. "It's the truth. I didn't lie to you."

"So what happen to getting the money from this pregnancy and getting yourself a house or finding yourself another job? You wanted a better life."

"Yes, yes. They will find me a house," she nodded at him, so earnest and so adamant in what the company had told her. "They will help me get a house with the money that they will pay me. My life will be better, Haymitch. They assured me but for now, I'll stay here where it is safe, where they can protect me."

 _I can protect you,_ he wanted to say. Instead what came out of his mouth was a horrified, "What did they do to you, Effie?"

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so truly sorry! I know it's been like 3 months and that's got to be the worst writer's block ever. No matter how hard I tried, i was always staring at a blank page of Microsoft Doc. I hope this chapter would do to kick start the rest of the future chapters.

** Chapter 8 **

She was staring up at him, the apprehension in her eyes made him want to tear his hair out. _She_ shouldn’t be afraid of _him._ She should be worrying about that _they_ had done to her, not what he would do to get her away.

“They helped me,” she answered.

“They did more than just help you. They’re manipulating you and you’re… You’re,” he stared at her pregnant stomach. “They’re manipulating you.”

“No,” Effie shook her head, “no, you’re wrong.”

It made him snort. He turned away from her, pinching the bridge of his nose when a thought occurred to him. It was a dirty trick. It would mean that he would have to lie to her but what choice did he have?

“You want me to go, yeah?”

Effie hesitated at the thought of him leaving but eventually, she nodded.

“Fine,” he gave a half shrug. “Gotta borrow your phone and let the kids know I’m coming home earlier than usual.”

Her brows creased and she titled her head. He didn’t usually bother telling Peeta or Katniss his comings and goings but still, Effie showed him to the phone.

Picking up the receiver, he made a show of dialling Katniss’ number and he pretended to talk to her when all he heard on the other line was the dial tone.

“What do you mean, Katniss? How’s he doing now?” he raised his voice.

“Is everything okay?” Effie rubbed her hands up and down her arms, peering at him worriedly.

He hung up and turned to face her, his heart racing in his chest. As a rule, he tried not to lie. He was often honest and sometimes his truth tended to be hurtful but he didn’t lie except this was different and he needed to get her away from this place.

 _There’s always an exception,_ he tried to rationalise it.

Haymitch took the sight of her in; blue eyes that were once bright with a fierce fire that she lacked now; the swell of her stomach, carrying a child that would never be hers and the way she worried her bottom lip as she waited for his answer. He recalled the smile on her face and the brief happiness she felt each time he visited, as if she was starved for a friend and he supposed she was. She was just too afraid to leave because if she did, she would realise that she have friends – Katniss and Peeta, Annie and her son, and even Johanna.

Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself for the lie.

“Peeta’s having trouble and Katniss ain’t getting’ him. He relapsed or somethin’ like that, couldn’t get the full story out of her.”

Peeta had only relapsed once earlier this year and overall, he was doing well but Effie didn’t need to know that.

“Look, sweetheart, the boy needs you. You were there in… in prison with him and I thought… I thought that if anyone can understand and help him, it’s you. He’s been dealing with it on his own. Talkin’ to Katniss or me ain’t the same as having someone who went through the shit with him. You’d understand him better than us and … And maybe, who knows, it might even be good for you, too.”

"It's been years… He's still... he's still...?"

"Yeah," Haymitch nodded, swallowing the bitter taste in his mouth. "He's alright most of the time but y'know, not so good during the victory anniversary and it’s coming, ain’t it? In two weeks? I guess it’s the same for all of us. Come back and visit him, just this once. You haven’t been to see him since he left the Capitol. He'll be glad. Both of them will. They miss you, Peeta especially. He was lookin’ for you after the war, same as I did."

"I don't want them to see me like this," she rested her hand on her stomach. “You know that.”

"They ain't gonna say anything. I'll warn them in advance before we arrive, yeah? Peeta will be glad to talk to you."

She bit her lip.

“Effie, please,” he begged, already at the end of his tethers. “Come back and visit us. Talkin’ to him will help.”

“Help him or help me?”

Effie wasn’t stupid. He figured, deep down, she knew what he was trying to do.

“Both. It works both ways. Effie, he’s learning to live and I’m fuckin’ certain there’s a thing or two he can help you with. This,” he gestured at her small living space, “ain’t it.”

Haymitch waited.

He just needed to get her out of this place, clear her head and let her see for herself that there was more out there than being confined to this place. She needed to realise they were using her fear to keep her grounded and monitor her. It was a horrendous company policy to ensure a hundred percent success rate. It was detrimental to her mental well-being. She could be someplace else - someplace better - and still be able to deliver the baby.

He needed to get rid of the baby once it was born, too. Give the child to the parents and break off all ties Effie ever had with being a surrogate.

"Only a few days," she finally acquiesced. “Only a few days.”

"Yeah, a few days,” Haymitch released his breath. He made no promises of bringing her back to the city. “Alright?"

"I don't have permission. I would need to speak to - "

"Don’t worry. I’ll handle it. I’ll tell them Peeta Mellark needs you and he’s someone important, ain’t he?"

Haymitch wasn’t sure if that would work. The new government, as far as they could, tried their best not to hand out favours even to rebel figureheads. There was a risk that Peeta’s name might not work, and trying to get the right strings pull with the right people would take time. He needed Effie away from here _now._

"Pack your bags now. We're leaving."

Effie gave a hesitant glance towards her bedroom.

“I told you I’ll handle it, Effie. We’ll get you that permission to leave for a few days.”

It took her another ten minutes to pack, longer if Haymitch didn’t take over and simply just dump everything in her bag. He led her out of the apartment and pressed the elevator button multiple times, his eyes darting left and right at the corridor.

All he needed was for one of the women to leave their apartment and it would be game over.

When the door opened, he ushered her in, willing it to move faster and emerged at the lobby where Haymitch flashed the security guard a smile.

“I thought you both just returned. Going out again? Usual place, then?” the old man asked.

“Yeah, usual. Coffee shop round the corner.”

“Haymitch, why did you tell that we’re going to – “

“Not now, Effie. Keep moving.”

He glanced at his watch. Going back and forth between Twelve and the Capitol meant that he memorised train schedules so he knew that there would be a train leaving in few minutes. If they missed that, they would have to wait for a few hours for the next outward bound train.

“Don’t rush me!” she snapped once they alighted from the taxi at the train station. “I am seven months pregnant, Haymitch!”

“The train’s leaving and you got to – fine, sorry. Get on the train. I’ll get the tickets.”

XxX

Effie did as he asked.

She waddled between the aisles of the seats until she found two empty ones and slowly lowered herself on the window seat. She peered outside, keeping her eyes on Haymitch. He was at the counter, queuing. There were three people ahead of him which meant it would take him a while.

He turned his head, glancing behind his shoulder and when he saw her, Effie gave him a smile.

Behind him, below the archway at the entrance of the train station, there were two uniformed officers approaching the train. Effie paid them no heed. They were probably there for the routine security rounds.

She rested her head against the window. She wished she could just stop thinking but her mind would not rest. There were a million thoughts in her head and the most prominent of those was that she was going to District Twelve. She was about to leave the City for the first time since the war ended.

She was going to District Twelve.

That thought made her heart skipped a beat and she felt herself struggling to breathe.

She was leaving. Even if it was only for a few days, she was still here on board a train that was about to take her to District Twelve.

The people would hate her there. She was Twelve’s escort. She should never step foot in Twelve.

_“You don’t belong in Twelve. They will never accept you. You belong here with us, with these women. You’re safe here.”_

Her hand flew to her throat, struggling to get air into her lungs.

What was she thinking agreeing to leave the only place that had guaranteed her safety?

She couldn’t do this. She would have to tell Haymitch the same. He would understand.

Effie rose to her feet and had only stepped out onto the aisle when the two uniformed officers slid the door open and came to a stand before her.

"Miss Effie Trinket?"

"Yes?"

"We have a warrant for your arrest."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh-oh. Is she paying the price for haymitch trying to save her?


	9. Chapter 9

** Chapter 9 **

The officers were not hostile with her. She couldn’t move, rooted to the spot in shock and a part of her expected to be manhandled the way she was in prison during the Rebellion. Instead, she was gently guided out of the train and onto the platform, and she wondered if they were being careful because she was heavily pregnant.

She supposed her suspicion was right because when Haymitch walked hurriedly towards the train, tickets in hand, he was swiftly put into cuffs.

“Please, don’t hurt him,” Effie said.

That was the last she saw of Haymitch and when she kept asking the officers what would happen to him, they had nothing to say. Effie was brought back to the facility and settled into a room.

She recognised the room. The two huge windows overlooking the traffic junction where she crossed paths with Haymitch was a giveaway. It was in this room that she was brought to when she first came to the facility. It was here that she signed her contract.  

Effie waited by herself. The two uniformed officers were nowhere to be seen. The hands on the wall clock ticked by and Effie counted fifteen minutes and forty seconds before the door opened and Omana walked in, a file clutched to her chest.

“They did not cuff you, did they?”

“No,” Effie shook her head.

“I told them not to. They are supposed to but I did not want to frighten you. You’ve put yourself in quite a predicament, Effie.”

“Haymitch…. I want to see him,” Effie demanded.

“You shall. But before that, I have some questions for you. I need you to cooperate with me, Effie, or you will be arrested just as Haymitch was. Where were you intending to go?”

“You have no reason to arrest me,” her voice was soft but in the quiet of the room, it carried.

“I have all the cause to. Now, where were you intending to go?”

“District Twelve. Peeta – “

“District Twelve…. And yet, you are still sitting there convinced that you did nothing wrong.”

“I have done nothing wrong. I have done everything that you asked of me. I was just going to visit a friend in District Twelve,” Effie argued.

The tone in Effie’s voice threw Omana off. She was not used to having Effie talk back.

“You have no right to treat me this way.”

“Oh, but I do, Effie. I do. You see, your intention to leave the City for District Twelve would have constituted a breach. Now, I can get you out of here, of course. I can argue based on technicalities. When we got to you, you were still _in_ the City. The train has not moved. That means, technically, you have not breached the contract you signed. Do you follow?”

Effie blinked. Her brows crinkled. “Why would it be a breach? Haymitch informed me that he had permission from you. You permitted me to leave for Twelve.”

“I did no such thing.”

“It can’t be,” Effie shook her head. “Haymitch told me – “

Right at that moment, the door swung inwards to admit Haymitch. The uniformed officers nudged him between his shoulder blade and he stepped into the room.

“Effie, oh, you poor thing,” Omana crooned, her voice mocking. “Haymitch here never did have my permission. When I spoke to him at the facility, he was disapproving of what you are doing. I don’t think he quite like our programme. He wanted to take you away, Effie. He wanted to bring you away from the very place that you feel safe.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Haymitch snarled.

His hands were still bound in cuffs.

“That’s not true. He told me that Peeta needs me,” Effie shot Haymitch a look, seeking confirmation of the same. Her head was spinning as tried to understand the situation. She felt uncertain, as if both of them were trying to manipulate her. “He told me that he had permission for me to leave for a few days. I swear by it.”

“Don’t listen to her, sweetheart.”

“Well, it would seem that he tells you a lot of things, darling,” Omana leaned back in her chair. There was a self-satisfied smile playing on her lips. She had Effie right where she wanted. “He’s a liar. He has lied to you before and he just lied to you again. You remember, of course, how he lied to you about the Rebellion. You told me all about it, remember? You told me all about being left behind by him during our programmes.”

Her eyes flickered to him.

“She’s trying to get into your head, Effie,” Haymitch insisted, desperate for her to understand. “Don’t listen to her. She’s poisoning you.”

“We can easily find out, don’t we? Let’s call Peeta Mellark.”

Haymitch’s eyes fluttered close and he hung his head. He should have spoken to Peeta, let him in on it. Peeta would have made sure the story was consistent but everything had been in a rush, and he never did get the chance to talk to the boy.

“I really hope you didn’t lie to me, Haymitch,” Effie whispered.  

When Omana handed the phone receiver to Effie, the look on her face was telling.

“I’m perfectly fine, Effie,” Peeta assured her. “How are you? You – You’ve never called.”

“I’m in good health, too. It was sweet of you to ask,” she answered calmly but her eyes were a different story.

It was fixed on Haymitch and she was glaring at him. Her hands were shaking and when she hung up, her posture was tensed.

“You’re a liar.”

“Effs, you gotta to understand, this place…. It’s a jail.”

“Why would you do that? I thought you cared about me, Haymitch. I thought you were my friend. You gave me something to focus on – the Avox Rehabilitation Program.”

“Effie, you gotta believe me. You know this place ain’t right. You _know_ it. You can tell. I had to get you away.”

“It is time to go, Effie,” Omana said softly, taking a hold of her arm.

“Where are you taking her?”

The smile Omana was giving Haymitch made Effie’s stomach churned. She did not like it and suddenly, the palm of her hands were cold. She was afraid.

“I’m saving her unlike you. If the management gets wind of this, she will be arrested. She will be asked to compensate for the breach in her contract and I hardly doubt she has that kind of money.”

“ _I_ have,” Haymitch jerked in his chair. “Whatever you need from her, I can give it to you.”

“You can’t give us the baby. Effie is a flight risk. She has you to thank for that. We can’t have her slipping out in the middle of the night to take a train out. In her situation, we can’t send her to prison either and personally, I would rather not do that. I am her officer. I am in-charge of her and it would reflect badly on me which leaves only one choice, really.”

“What’s that?” Effie asked.

“We’re inducing labour. You are going to deliver us the baby today or tomorrow, depending.”

“What?” Effie startled and jerked back, taking a step away from Omana. “I – I’m not…. It’s too early. I’m only 31 weeks in. You can’t.”

“Are you out of your mind?!” Haymitch shouted. “I thought you’re all about success rate. How will it be fucking successful if that baby dies?”

“The baby won’t. I have checked with Effie’s doctor and both mother and child are healthy. There’s a good survival rate, better than if she were to take off last month and I had to induce her. Not to worry, our facility has excellent neo-natal care. You know, Haymitch, I think I shall let you come along. Let us show you our first-rate health care system. Perhaps you will stop doubting our capabilities.”

“She’s not giving birth today,” Haymitch argued.

“Oh, yes, she will. She will.”

“The parents…” Effie breathed out, trying to rationalise the situation. “They will wonder… It’s earlier than expected.”

“Babies,” Omana laughed lightly. “They never do arrive as planned, do they? I can easily just inform them that you went into labour early. Of course, I can also tell them that you were attempting to kidnap their unborn child and the repercussions for that will be severe.”

“You take her anywhere near a fuckin’ hospital, I will kill you,” Haymitch warned and he was being deadly serious. “She’s not due yet.”

 


	10. Chapter 10

** Chapter 10 **

As he travelled in the car, Haymitch took stock of his surroundings. He recognised the streets and as he passed familiar landmarks, he deduced that he was being taken back to the facility where Effie lived.

“I want to speak to Plutarch Heavensbee,” Haymitch demanded as he alighted from the car.

“Peculiar choice,” one of the officers remarked and out of curiousity, he asked, “will he be able to help?”

Haymitch’s steps faltered but he picked up his pace.

“He better,” Haymitch grumbled.

Plutarch had been the one to tell him that surrogacy was a norm and that it had been in place in the Capitol for years. This company that Effie had sold her womb to had tough and strict policies but they had taken care of Effie. Her needs were met and the needs of the baby she was carrying were met. Trying to prove that they had manipulated her would take a long time and as much as he would like to tear this company apart, Effie was more important to him than anything else. His priority now was her.

If he could get her out…. If he could get her away then he could deal with the company later.

“Do they survive? Those that became surrogates….”

The officer walking next to Haymitch shot him a look. “What exactly do you think is happening? At the end of their journey, those surrogates gave birth to the baby. Most of them survive and the baby leads a healthy life.”

“Most,” Haymitch spat.

“Sometimes there are complications during child birth but so far, that has only happened three times in this facility. Being a surrogate isn’t any different than a mother carrying their own child, you know.”

They walked past the lift that would have taken him to Effie’s room. Instead, Haymitch was led to another wing - the labour ward. His heart rate began to rise, and Haymitch gritted his teeth.

“She’s too early,” he told the officers. “It ain’t right.”

“It is not right to breach the terms of the contract either. Imagine the woman you paid to carry your child taking the train for another district… Wouldn’t your heart break at the thought of never meeting your child?”

Haymitch conceded that point. If it was his child in the surrogacy programme, he would have wanted the surrogate to honour the contract, too.

“There’s got to somethin’ else that can be done,” Haymitch retorted.

Both the officers held their tongue and the conversation died. They walked past the double doors and into the room. Haymitch took in the calmness of the hospital room which was such a drastic different than the labour ward he had been to when Finn was born.

“Haymitch…”

He turned at the sound of her voice to see her lying on a bed in a hospital gown. He hurried over to her, his hands still bound in cuff.

“You will be okay,” she murmured.

He frowned. Shouldn’t _he_ be the one to tell her that? Shouldn’t it be him doing the assuring?

“Take off his cuffs. We’re not pressing charges against him,” Omana directed. She gave Haymitch a sardonic smile. “I supposed you have your uses, Haymitch. You’re lucky she’s sensible.”

She walked out, leaving him alone with Effie.

“What is she talkin’ about?” he spoke quietly, brushing her hair away from her face.

“I saved you from prison. That’s what we do – save each other from imprisonment. President Coin wanted to have me tried and you stopped it so now… Well…”

“Effie….”

“I let them induce me as long as they agree to let you go free. They agreed so here I am,” she forced a smile on her lips. “It will be okay now.”

He could only stare at her.

“You – Fuck, Effs,” he hit his hand against the side of the bed in anger.

If he needed more reasons to hate Omana, this was it. Using him to get to her, the nerve of that woman, he fumed.

“You shouldn’t have… I can deal with prison. I can deal with it. Plutarch could probably get me out or somethin’. You shouldn’t –  Don’t you see it? They’re using _me_ to get to you. I’m all you have and they’re using it against you. They’re no better than Snow.”

“It’s human nature, isn’t it, to use what you hold dear against you?” she asked wryly. “It doesn’t matter. It’s done now. And….I want it, too. I want this to be over.”

“What?” he blinked.

“I don’t want to be pregnant anymore. I – I can’t… You said it’s not my baby. You tell me that all the time and it hurts, Haymitch. It hurts so much. I want her to be mine. I want her – This,” she rested her hand on her stomach, “is not my baby.”

“She’s not your baby,” Haymitch nodded and pressed a kiss against her forehead.

“But I love her,” she whispered.

“You can’t, sweetheart. If you give birth to her and try to keep her, you’re going to spend the rest of your life lookin’ over your shoulder. This fuckin’ company will come after you. The baby’s parents will come for you, too. It’s their child, Effie, and it was promised to them. You’re carryin’ it _for_ them. How’d they feel if you were to take their baby away?”

“What about how I feel?” she asked and her face scrunched in pain.

“Effie? You okay?”

“Yes,” she breathed out. “It’s the contractions.”

“How long?”

Annie was in labour for eight hours, if he remembered correctly.

“I don’t know. I have heard of labours going on for hours.”

“Yeah, I was there for Annie’s. Johanna wanted to punch a wall because the wait was killing us all,” he chuckled.

“Will you stay?”

“I won’t leave,” he promised and hooked his leg over the chair to pull it towards him.

Effie was quiet, staring at the ceiling. She held his hand, resting it on top of her chest and he could feel her heart beating steadily.

“I know I have to give her up,” she voiced out, breaking the silence that had cloaked them. “I know it would not be easy but I – I am trying to be positive.”

That was a quality he admired about her. She always did try to be optimistic even in the bleakest and hopeless situation but deep in his heart, he wasn’t sure if this was one of those occasion where a fake smile and a forced laugh could get her back on her feet.

“I am telling myself to think about why I agreed to this in the first place. I want to have a better life. I will be able to have a house, and some money. My life will be better, wouldn’t it?”

“Yeah,” he forced himself to commit to the lie because he was certain that having to give up a baby she had carried with her for seven months, close to eight would not make her life better. If anything, it could risk plunging her even deeper into misery. “Of course, sweetheart.”

 _But you’re here now,_ he tried to tell himself and he hoped his presence would be enough to make a difference to her when she the time comes for her to do what was needed.

 

 

 


	11. Chapter 11

** Chapter 11 **

She was in pain, each contraction more painful and lasted longer than the ones that came before. Each time a contraction hit, she grasped his hand, moaning and groaning. Sometimes she screamed - the cry of someone going through real and unimaginable pain - only to fall silent. Twice, he asked the doctor if there was anything that could ease her pain.

“It’ll be over soon,” Haymitch told her.

It could very well be a few more hours and that wasn’t soon enough for him but that was all he got to go by.

On the second hour, Omana waltz into the room to inform them that the baby’s biological parent was in the waiting area. They had expressed interest in being with Effie and to stay with her through her labour, to encourage and support, and to witness the birth of their child. Haymitch knew their intentions were pure and genuine but he refused it on Effie’s behalf.

“And here I thought that when she signed the contract, anonymity was part of the terms,” Haymitch sneered.

“Yes, it is,” Omana answered curtly, “but they do not seem to mind her knowing who they are.”

“So what? They can breach the terms but she can’t?”

“They are _not_ breaching the terms. I informed them that the birth is imminent and if they like, they could come to the hospital. They did, and now they are seeking permission to be in here to witness the birth. If Effie allows it, I will let them in. If she doesn’t, they shall remain outside until the baby is delivered. This works both ways.”

“Your call, sweetheart,” Haymitch spoke to her, “but I think its best they remain where they are.”

Effie’s answer was a simple shake of her head. Omana nodded and left them alone once more to convey the message to the parents. With her gone, Haymitch sat perched on the edge of the bed with his arms around Effie. She curled against him, her face pressed on his chest as she sobbed.

“They’re here. They’re waiting to take my baby away the moment she’s born. They will snatch her from me.”

Haymitch couldn’t help the sigh that escaped from him. They were back where they started.

“She’s not yours, Effie,” he ran his fingers through her hair. “I thought you understood that.”

“I can’t give – “ she couldn’t finish her sentence. She clutched his shirt in desperation, her eyes pleading with him. “You can’t let them come in here. You have to protect my baby. You have to protect her from them like you would protect your own daughter.”

 _But she’s not mine. She’s not ours,_ he wanted to say but he swallowed the words.

“Effie…” he let out a breath. “That baby is _their_ child. I can’t keep them away from their own child.”

“No, no! I’m the one carrying her, Haymitch. Not them.”

“Look, lie back down, alright? Don’t stress yourself out. It ain’t good for you and the… the baby.”

Haymitch didn’t know which was more painful for her right now – the contractions or the thought of giving the baby away. He tried to understand her situation but he didn’t think he could ever begin to scratch the surface.

“Sweetheart,” he spoke softly, “when this is over, you’ll be free.”

She grimaced and Haymitch gritted his teeth, realizing that that was not what she wanted to hear.

“At the price of my girl…”

“You – You can’t think that way, Effie. Remember what you said earlier, about being positive… You’re not in it for the baby. This is just a job.”

“Don’t be so heartless! It is not so easy, Haymitch,” she scowled at him. “You are not a mother. You did not carry her.”

“Then you should have thought about that before you did somethin’ so stupid like this!” he raised his voice and fell silent immediately at the look on her face. “You always get attached, sweetheart. That’s your problem. I know you were desperate but - ”

“She would love me,” she whispered. “My little girl. She wouldn’t leave me like everyone else did.”

Perhaps that was her problem – being on her own and needing to be loved. He felt the twinge in his heart, the guilt bubbling to the surface. He had a hand in making her feel that way. He should have looked for her much earlier. He shouldn’t have taken for granted that she was doing well on her own after the war. He should have looked harder, ask every contact that he knew.

He shouldn’t have left her in the Capitol. He should have made her a home in Twelve.

He should have… He sighed yet again. There were a lot of things that he should have done but those were all in the past. This was now, and he could do something right for the first time.

“I ain’t gonna leave you again,” he promised. “I won’t. Not this time. No one else needs me anymore. I’m gonna be here.”

Effie said nothing and he couldn’t blame her. If he was in her position, he wouldn’t believe himself either. Not after being left behind twice. .

“Haymitch,” she said suddenly, and the tone of her voice sent him on alert immediately.

“What? Somethin’ wrong?”

“Please call the doctor,” she spoke calmly but her eyes betrayed her. She was panicking. “I think my water broke.”

“Your what? What’s broken?”

“My water! Get the doctor, Haymitch!”

“I – Yes, okay, just – just calm down,” he instructed.

He felt a chill, a sense of disbelief that this was happening as he hurried to get the doctor who confirmed that her water had broken.

It wasn’t long after that, another hour, perhaps two. Haymitch didn’t really keep track anymore. The nurses came by a few times to check on her dilation, trying to ascertain if she was ready, and when they began to prepare her for delivery, Haymitch hovered by the side of her bed, uncertain of his role and at the same time, not wanting to get in the way of the nurses and Effie.

He only knew that he would not leave the room and if they asked that of him, they would have to forcibly remove him.

In the end, Haymitch didn’t have to worry about such a thing. One of the nurses smiled sympathetically at him and beckoned him nearer to Effie’s bed before placing her hand in his.

“You hold on to her. She’s going to need you,” the nurse said. “It will help if you talk to her and encourage her through this.”

“I – Yeah, yeah, of course,” he nodded.

Haymitch paid the nurses no attention once the screaming started. His primary focus was on her. Each time her face scrunched in pain and each time she screamed herself hoarse, it made him grimace. He forced the instinctive reaction to pull his hand away when she gripped on it so tightly that he thought she might break his bones. He made her look him in the eye when she pleaded and panted that she couldn’t do it, and told her firmly to push and to finish the job.

“You gotta do this, sweetheart. You’re nearly at the end of line. One more push,” he told her, hoping that she could hear him through her grunts of pain. “Just one more and you’re – “

The cries of the baby broke through the chaos and they both fell silent. Effie stared at him wide-eye as if she couldn’t believe that it happened, that she had given birth and that was a baby crying. Even he was shocked but he masked it better than she did. His gaze remained locked with hers.

“Good job, sweetheart,” he kissed her forehead. “Hell of a fight but you did it.”

Effie nodded with a ghost of a small smile. Her body began to relax, the grip on his hand slackened.

Haymitch brushed his thumb lightly against her brows, watching her eyes closed in exhaustion.

When he glanced behind his shoulder, he saw the nurses wrapping the baby in a blanket, still coated in amniotic fluid and blood, and whisked it away out of the room.

They did not even let her see the baby she delivered, not even to glance down upon the baby’s face or to let her feel the baby’s soft skin beneath the pad of her thumb and feel the baby’s breath against her cheek as she held her.

He supposed, as cold as that was, it was a good thing because Effie might never let the baby out of her sight otherwise.


	12. Chapter 12

** Chapter 12 **

 

It was a girl just as Effie had told him and the newborn had been taken to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. The biological parents had been allowed to visit the baby.

 

That was all he knew.

 

His attention had been focused on Effie after that. She had not been allowed to leave and he didn’t argue because he was of the opinion that she should have optimal bed rest after her ordeal.

 

Haymitch pulled the paper towel and used it to dry his face before stepping out of the toilet and back into her room.

 

She was awake and was watching him as he entered.

 

"You didn't protect her."

 

Haymitch flinched.

 

"Why do you always fail me?"

 

He gritted his teeth at her question and took a step towards her bed.

 

The glint in her eyes made him wary. She was angry and disappointed, and he didn’t need years of experience to know that. It was plain to see.

 

“You should add her to the list of people you failed to protect,” she added. “You have a list, don’t you, Haymitch? It would seem that the list is growing again. First your family…”

 

"Stop it," he told her in a low voice.

 

"Your girlfriend...."

 

His fingers curled into a fist. "I said stop it."

 

"Finnick.... And now, a little baby that - "

 

"That's enough!" He shouted and breathed heavily. His pupils were dilated and he was staring at her in disbelief and frustration that she would throw _that_ in his face.

 

His outburst robbed her off her fury and Effie fell silent. She curled into a fetal position. Haymitch remained where he was. He didn’t trust himself to be near her. His breathing was under control and his hands had stopped shaking but he just wanted to be sure and to keep her safe.

 

"I want to see her, Haymitch," she whispered, her voice cracking as she spoke. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry about what I said. I - "

 

He swallowed and slowly unfurled his fist. He pressed it flat against his thigh, took another step towards the bed and lowered himself onto the seat.

 

"You're hurting. You think throwin’ that in my face would make it even," he kept his tone neutral, “but it won’t, Effie. What happened here… It shouldn’t happen to anyone and it’s difficult for you, I know that, but you need to know -”

 

"I'm sorry."

 

He shrugged.

 

"The last thing I want is to see you this way, sweetheart. If there’s somethin' I could have done I would have done it."

 

"I want to meet her,” she said once more. “Just once. I will take the memory with me. I will learn to live with it. I just need to see her. I – I’ve thought about the way she looks. I’ve thought about the colour of her eyes and the curve of her mouth. I’ve pictured if for months and I – Please. Help me see her.”

 

He wasn’t keen on it. It wasn’t a good idea. Perhaps, not meeting the baby would be better for her. There was no need to complicate things any further than it already was. The child wasn’t hers to raise and nurture. The child wasn’t hers to love. She would never meet or cross paths with the child again. It would only be worse if she were to lay her eyes on the girl.

 

Still, on the one hand, she had carried the baby in her womb for months and she deserved this chance to meet her at least once before the baby was taken from her life forever. This could be the closure she needed to move on.

 

She would be breaking the rule. Omana had already made it clear to him that Effie was not allowed to meet or interact with the child as was their policy unless the biological parents allowed it.

 

 _It’s not_ interacting _if all she does is to see the child from far,_ he thought to himself as the loophal became apparent to him.

 

"Can you stand?" he asked.

 

She was definitely surprised by the question but she nodded quickly. With his arm around her shoulder, Haymitch led her down to the NICU.

 

He was glad that this was not a public hospital. It belonged to the surrogacy company which meant that the facility was private. This also meant that there was only one baby in the NICU and she was in the incubator.

 

They made quite a sight standing in front of the glass window, peering in.

 

"You see her, sweetheart?"

 

"Yes," she affirmed, her breath fogging the glass. She had both palms pressed against the window. "She's so tiny. Oh, Haymitch, she's so tiny. Will she grow up healthy?"

 

"She's a little early, yeah? That should explain her size. Don’t think she can breathe on her own properly just yet. See all those tubes? Give her time – she’s gonna be fine."

 

They stood next to each other and Haymitch was struck by how familial the scene and the conversation were. They sounded like parents. That could be his child if the circumstances had been different. He had never wanted a child – that dream died along with his girl – but if Effie had to give birth to a baby, it should have been _his_. That child should be theirs and not someone else’s.

 

He blinked, surprised by this line of thought. He paused to try and figure out where this flare of possessiveness came from but if he was honest, it had always been there. He recalled very vividly all those times he turned green at the sight of Effie flirting with another man. Effie had always been his and even if she disappeared from his life for years, it did little to erase that fact.

 

"Can't we go in, Haymitch? I want to meet her properly."

 

He turned his head to look at the fragile, sleeping child before his gaze shifted to her once more.

 

"You can't, sweetheart. It's for - "

 

The sound of approaching footsteps made him wary. If they were caught….

 

A couple rounded the corner, oblivious to their presence. They were deep in conversation but as they came closer, the woman turned to look at them and she stopped abruptly.

 

Next to him, Effie made an odd strangled noise.

 

“Effie?” the woman asked in clear disbelief.

 

“Eirene,” Effie breathed. “Eirene….”

 

“Who?” Haymitch glanced in Effie’s direction, seeking clarification.

 

“You’re alive?” the woman blinked as if she couldn’t quite believe who she saw standing in front of her.

 

She took a few steps towards them and Haymitch’s first instinctive move was to protect Effie. The woman, Eirene, paused when she noticed how Haymitch had placed himself between her and Effie. Her brows crinkled and her eyes flitted from Effie, still in her hospital gown, to the baby in the NICU, and Haymitch saw the exact moment the pieces began to make sense for her.

 

She started badly and she reached out for the man who was with her.

 

“It’s Effie,” she whispered. “My sister is our surrogate.”

 

If it made sense to Eirene, it made no sense to him, and judging from the look on Effie’s face, she was in a desperate need of an explanation.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like that little twist at the end! When I first wrote this, I intended for the biological parents to be just some random couple but I decided otherwise. I know no mention of Effie's family was made in canon, but if you've read some of my other stories, you know I've created some headcanons for Effie where her family is concerned (most of the time, her sister's dead but here...).
> 
> I don't want to say too much but her sister being in here will be explained in the future chapter.


	13. Chapter 13

** Chapter 13 **

The clock ticked on. Seconds stretched into minutes. Effie’s eyes had taken on a wary, guarded look as if she was afraid of what she was seeing, as if she was afraid to hope.

“Effie…”

The voice, familiar and soft, seemed to pull her back to the present and forced her to acknowledge what was before her.

“How are you here?”

Effie took a step forward and when Haymitch’s hand shot out to hold her back, she moved her hand away. The woman in front of them mirrored her actions. Slowly, one step at a time, the distance between them shrunk, and Effie was in her sister’s embrace.

“You’re real,” she whispered.

“I am,” the woman nodded earnestly. She pulled away briefly to cup Effie’s cheeks. “I didn’t know it was you. I had no idea. I never knew you were carrying my child.”

Startled by the woman’s claim on the baby she had recently given birth to, Effie backed away a step. Her eyes darted to the glass window of the NICU.

“That is… She is _yours?_ ”

Haymitch could almost see the unspoken question on Effie’s lips - _“I carried your baby?”_

“Mine. She’s ours,” Eirene answered as she nodded at the man standing slightly behind her, looking as loss as Haymitch.

The man stepped forward, hand extended and introduced himself first to Effie and then to Haymitch, “Marius Gen. Eirene’s husband.”

Effie’s eyes grew wide. This was new information to her.

“I – Congratulations…,” Effie said with a slight uncertainty. She turned towards Haymitch. “This is my sister – Eirene. I thought… I thought I’ve lost everyone.”

“This reunion is all well and good but I think we should do the catchin’ up elsewhere, yeah?” Haymitch said.

Haymitch and Effie retraced their steps back to her room followed by Eirene and Marius. Effie settled back to bed while Haymitch watched her carefully. He didn’t offer his help for which she was glad but once she was under the covers, he came closer towards the bed.

“I’ll leave you to talk with your sister, alright. I’ll be outside.”

“No,” she curled her fingers around her wrist. “Stay with me.”

With a nod, he sat at the edge of Effie’s bed while Eirene and Marius occupied the two armchairs. Eirene pulled her chair closer to Effie. She slipped her hand into her sister’s and Effie held on to it, unwilling to let it go now that she had found her family.

“All these while, we never knew who was carrying our daughter,” Eirene began to explain. “Omana was our liaison officer with the company and everything was done through her. All appointments, all contract. She was the one to advise us that it was better to keep identities confidential for both parties. She told us that was how things are done in most surrogacy. We followed her advice. Of course, we did. We didn’t really know how this works.”

“She told me the same; that it was for the baby’s sake. So that I could not interfere with her life once I have given her up.”

Eirene flinched at that. “I cannot imagine, Effie. I cannot imagine carrying a child, letting her go and never being able to know how she’s doing.”

“You agreed to it.” Effie pointed out and Haymitch did not miss the hint of accusation in her voice.

“Eirene came up with a suggestion,” Marius’ voice filled the room, “that we send photos of our child to the surrogate mother – to _you_ – each year as the baby grows. Even if you couldn’t visit, you would still be able to … Well…”

“Omana didn’t think it was wise to make it part of the deal,” Eirene explained.

“You realised she’s the problem, yeah? Company policy or not, when you both entered this contract, _she_ was well-aware of both your identities. How many Trinkets are there here in this City, huh? She must have known you’re related somewhat, hell with all that background checks, she shoulda’ known you’re sisters. She kept that information to herself.”

Marius was nodding in agreement. The two sisters sat, shell shocked as if they were only now considering this thought.

 “I’d rather… I don’t want to think about her right now,” Effie muttered under her breath. “Why didn’t you look for me, Eirene? After the war… Why didn’t you?”

“I thought you were dead. President Snow executed victors and escorts. There were public executions for some of them. He executed stylists and sponsors. Anyone he thought who had information on the Mockingjay. I thought you were one of them, Effie. You disappeared after the second quarter quell just like that stylist of yours, Cinna. Portia was executed on live television not long after. Everywhere I look, they said you were a traitor. There were footages of you purchasing gold wig, gold pendant and gold bracelet; gold like the Mockingjay’s pin. I was so afraid for you. Mother said you were being stupid. I waited for your execution. I was terrified each time I turned on the television but there was nothing, no news. Father was worried sick. We had to assume you had suffered a similar fate as Cinna. They branded him a traitor, too. Mother… Mother said that perhaps it was better that you died. You would never be accepted into society once the war is over. She saw it before any of us did, Effie. She said you’d be hunted by both sides.”

Effie cast her gaze down. She took a deep, shuddering breath when she felt the heavy weight of Haymitch’s hand on her shoulder.

“She was with Katniss when President Snow was executed. You should have seen her on television then," Haymitch frowned.

“I was grieving by that point,” Eirene shook her head. “I did not care which president live or die. I did not care about what would happen to this country. I lost my family; all of them. I lost my child during the bombing at the mansion. My parents and husband were shot in the chaos, trying to get to my son. Whether Snow or Coin lived, it wouldn’t bring my baby boy back. I didn’t look for you, Effie, because I had no reason to. I thought you were dead like everyone else was.”

"I thought you were, too," Effie admitted. "I went back our family’s house. It wasn’t a house anymore only rubble."

Eirene threaded their fingers together. "It doesn’t matter. We're here now. We've found each other."

Effie nodded, staring at their linked hands. When she looked up, she asked the question Haymitch was sure had been at the forefront of her mind all these while.

"Why this surrogacy?"

On her part, Eirene didn’t seem surprise by it.

“Three years after the war, I remarried,” Eirene explained.

Effie’s gaze flitted to Marius.

“I wanted to rebuild my life. _We_ wanted to have a family but I … couldn't. I wasn't trying to replace the child I lost," Eirene said hurriedly at the look Effie was giving her.  "I just wanted... I wanted a life again. For years, after that, we kept trying for a child but I couldn’t. I suffered two miscarriages and so, we opted for this."

"I’m sorry,” Effie said.

“How did you get here, Effie? This place… Doing what you’re doing…."

"It's a long story," Effie tried to put on a brave smile. "I was in a desperate place and I needed … I thought this was what I need to put my life together."

Eirene glanced over at Haymitch for clarification but he had nothing to say to that. He wasn’t there during those years of her life.

Sensing that Effie did not want to talk about it, Eirene moved on.

"Well, we received a call to say that the surrogate … that you were in labour. We came to the hospital as soon as we could. We wanted to be with you, to witness the birth but..."

She trailed off. They all knew that Effie had not allowed it.

"We didn’t expect the baby to be early. So eager," Marius laughed lightly.

"It wasn't her time yet. She wasn't due. I was induced," Effie divulged that piece of information.

A deep frown graced Eirene’s feature. “Are you alright? You were induced for health reasons, I supposed? Or was it the baby?”

At her questions, Effie looked over at Haymitch at the same time that he did. He lifted his shoulder in a shrug. It was up to her to tell her sister the truth.

"It had nothing to do with my health. Omana had concerns that I would run away with the baby.”

Eirene gasped loudly.

“Before you think the worst of her,” Haymitch interrupted. “She wasn’t planning on runnin’ away with the baby. I had to get her away. She could have given birth someplace else other than this damn facility.”

“I need you to explain yourself,” Marius crossed his arms.

“Omana was manipulating her. She was playin' on her fears," Haymitch growled. "The longer she stays here -"

Eirene cut Haymitch off, saying "I don't understand. Manipulating?"

"Haymitch tried to save me," Effie spoke quietly. "We were caught at the train station and Omana decided to induce the labour."

That was when she told her sister everything. Occasionally, Haymitch chimed in, telling them what he suspected was going on in the facility since Effie did not even realise it was being done to her for her to tell her sister anything.

"They'd do anything to keep up the high success rate including keepin’ the surrogates in the compound. That’s why they make it in their policy to keep identity secrets so you can’t come over to socialise with the woman carrying your baby, and they can’t go to you either. They find women who are desperate, who had lost things in the war, women who are alone and have no connections outside. Desperate people are easier to manipulate and bend to your will," Haymitch spat. “They’d be easier to control and monitor – their activities, food intake and the progress of the baby.”

Effie told her sister about her first attempt at surrogacy, the miscarriage that followed and the penalty she faced.

It took a toll on her to recount her experience, and by the end of it, Effie was crying. Even as Eirene held her sister in her arm, she looked stun.

"If what you say is true, they cannot get away with it," Marius spoke up. “This isn’t a factory. They’re still… _people_.”

"Yeah, I agree but right now, Effie’s all I care about. I’ve been searchin’ for her for years and you know why I can never find her? They facility was careful to conceal her whereabouts. I bumped into her and imagine my fuckin’ surprise to see she’s pregnant, and not even with her own child," Haymitch grumbled. "I needed to get her away from here and that hasn’t change. If you want to see this company folds itself be my guest."

"I have contacts,” Marius said. He was being serious and by the look on his face, it would seem that he would see it through. “I will see what can be done."

“I’ve never seen her,” Effie sat up as she admitted that fact, steering the conversation away from Omana and the facility, something she would rather not think about. “She was taken away from me the moment I gave birth. I didn’t get to see how she looks like.”

“Oh, dear.” Eirene was shaking her head.

“I – I made Haymitch bring me to the NICU just so I could… I just needed to see how she looks like,” she gave a tired smile. “I know it’s not allowed, Eirene, but I had to. Does she have your eyes?”

“I don’t know,” Eirene brushed Effie’s hair back. “It’s too early to tell her eye colours but I hope so.”

"You won’t report us, would you? It’s not Haymitch’s fault,” Effie said hurriedly. “It was mine.”

"Why on earth - nonsense! I will do no such thing and you don’t even have to ask that of me," Eirene exclaimed. "Now, do you know what I think? I think that you, of all people, deserve to meet her. You've given us such a great gift and… Come, Effie, please."

"Yes, Eirene’s right. You both deserve to meet her," Marius nodded at Haymitch and Effie.

"They ain't bad for Capitols," Haymitch whispered in Effie's ear as they walked towards the NICU once again. “I always thought your family was a bit… Like you, you know? A pain in the ass.”

“You should have met my mother then,” Effie said with a smile.

Haymitch returned her smile, glad to see that the forlorn, helpless air she had about her was slowly dissipating.

 

 

 


	14. Chapter 14

 

** Chapter 14 **

Haymitch lingered near the door, watching Effie as she stood over the incubator. There was a gleam in her eyes. Her mouth had parted slightly when she saw the baby for the first time. It was Eirene who guided her hand through the opening in the incubator and from then, she had let instinct take over.

Effie ran her finger gently over the girl's cheek, marveling at the softness of her skin.

"She's beautiful," she said softly, her voice carried towards where he was. "Have you given her a name?"

"Marilla," Eirene answered, "what do you think of it?"

Effie nodded with a smile. "I like it."

While the two sisters bonded over the infant, Marius wandered over to Haymitch. He nodded towards the door and Haymitch followed him out of the NICU.

"I found something about Omana. You are not going to like it."

"Other than the fact that she's a bitch?" he retorted. "Tell me."

"It's tragic. Her story."

"Yeah, we all have tragic stories. We don't go around being a thorn in someone else's side. What happened?"

"She was from District Two. Did you know that? Lost her child to the Games," Marius said. "The boy volunteered but it didn't mean his lost hurt her any less."

 _He didn't lose the Games. He died,_ Haymitch wanted to correct him but held his tongue.

"So she doesn't like anyone involved with the Games?"

"You could say that. Effie's fall from grace was not enough to tide her over. She offered Effie this option of surrogacy not to help. I don't think her intention was ever to help. I have not spoken to Omana, there is no need to let her know I am in on her so I am merely assuming, making best guesses. She might want Effie to feel what it's like to lose a child. That could have been her main motivation."

"And your wife?"

"The fact that Effie was carrying our child might have just been coincidental. There is no way to know until I speak to Omana. Do you wish to -"

"No. I don't think I want to be anywhere near her."

"What will happen to Effie once she's been discharged?" Marius asked, changing the subject. "Where will she go?"

Haymitch shifted his weight to one foot and leaned against the wall. "We haven't discussed it."

"So you have no idea if she will remain here in the city? You were going to take her with you to the district when you were both caught, yes?"

"Yeah," Haymitch affirmed.

"It is over now. What is stopping you from taking her home with you?"

Haymitch felt the prickled on his skin. He rubbed the back of his neck absent-mindedly. The very thought of taking her _home_ with him had felt more and more like the right thing to do as they days grew by. His home wasn't her home. She didn't have one here either and it wouldn't have been wrong to offer the extra room in his house to her but things were changing now.

"She might not want to anymore," Haymitch shrugged. "She's found her sister. The baby she thought she had to give up turned out to be her niece. There's a tie there, a family link. They ain't strangers no more – the baby and her."

He searched Marius eyes for any signs or flicker of objections, if the idea of Effie being a part of _his_ family's life was intolerable and he found none.

"Effie's got no reason to come with me anymore. She's got everythin' she needs right here. She's got no apartment or anything like that yet but I don't think that's gonna be a problem for her. She might use the money from this surrogacy to build her life back up."

"If she decides to stay here, she will have nothing to worry about. My wife and I will help. We have room in our house for her should she need it. We can help her look around for a place to stay if she wants it or help out with other finances until she's stable. We owe her."

"Yeah," Haymitch nodded, his fist clenched at his side, "yeah, that's good. She'll appreciate it."

He turned to look at her through the glass window and she raised her head at the same time. Their eyes caught. She smiled at him and he forced one of his face, hoping it didn't look too much like a grimace.

She could be happy now. She would be free from contractual obligations and her life would be her own. He would return to District Twelve, his duty to her now over. He had seen her through this pregnancy just like he had told himself he would.

XxX

"Oh, Haymitch," she sighed contentedly, "she's truly the most beautiful person I've ever laid my eyes upon and all she does is sleep!"

He nodded without truly listening. Effie was talking rapidly as she was prone to do when she had so much to say and when she was excited about one thing or another.

"She has the softest skin! Have I told you her name? Marilla – that's her name."

"Effie, we need to -"

"I just love watching her. I can do it all day. The way her eyelids flutter as if she's dreaming, the way her chest rise and fall. She's so precious, Haymitch. You should have come in with me. Eirene would have allowed it."

He ran a hand over his face.

"Sweetheart," he grabbed her arms to ground her. "We need to talk."

Her smile faltered and her expression grew somber.

"We need to talk about comes after this," he spoke. "We need to talk about you. What are you gonna do? Most importantly, where are you gonna go?"

He wondered if she had thought that far or if her mind was only filled with the baby. She stared down at the space between them, worrying her lips between her teeth.

"My sister has offered me her home. She told me that I'm welcome to stay for as long as I want, for as long as I need. I do not intend for it to be a permanent solution. I would like a place of my own, and I would like the three of them to grow as a family. It is only fair. It was why Eirene sought a surrogate in the first place – to have a family. But you see it, don't you, Haymitch? I will be close to Marilla in the meantime. I will be with her every day."

Haymitch released a breath. A part of him had expected this and yet, the blow still left him reeling.

"Yeah," he nodded, letting his hand fall to his sides, "the baby, of course."

"You're unhappy," she frowned. "She's like my own child."

"She's not," he said with a hard edge to his voice. "She's your niece."

"She's as good as mine. She's family."

He moved to the window and stared down at the streets below. He didn't want to argue with her.

"Where else will I go? Where else can I go?" she asked him finally, and he wondered if she needed to hear it from him, to know if his offer still meant anything.

"With me," he turned around, "to Twelve. Nothing has changed."

For a long time, all she did was look at him, studying him. "Why?"

"What?"

"Why are you offering your home to me?"

He chuckled darkly. "Come on, Effie," he said.

She should know. She _should_ know. He didn't just do any of this for anyone. He didn't offer his home to just any woman.

She took a step towards him, moving closer and closer. The space between them shrunk until all that he was aware of was the blue of her eyes staring up at him and her warm breath blowing against his chin each time she exhaled. She tilted her head up. Her fingers crept and eventually curled around his wrist.

Haymitch rested a hand on her hip, inhaling the smell of cheap hospital shampoo on her hair.

This stance felt familiar. This felt exactly like it had in her room a few days ago when he had asked her to come with him, like he was asking her now.

_Don't kiss me when you're going to push me away._

He had said that. He remembered telling her that.

He didn't want her to push him away and the thought brought a dull ache in his chest. He tried to form the words, to let her know the truth but he couldn't. He was never one to express his feelings.

He splayed his fingers on the small of her back to bring her closer to him. Her breath hitched and as he leaned forward, he saw the way her pupils had blown wide in anticipation. She knew what he was about to do and she didn't stop him. Haymitch brushed his lips against hers.

If this was it, he might as well seize it. The kiss turned rough and insistent, and desperate. He clutched her to him. He never thought he could crave someone's touch or needed to be close to her this much until now. He leaned into her palm when she rested it against his cheek. If her intention was to drown him, he would willingly let go.

Effie was the one to break the kiss. She leaned her forehead against his chin, fighting to get her breathing under control.

"Are you saying goodbye?" he asked.

She said nothing. The side of his shirt was fisted in her hand.

"I can't go back and forth between Twelve and the Capitol, sweetheart. I can't do it just to spend a few days with you and then go back."

"You did it for months."

"Yeah, I wanted to make things right with you. _I_ left you in the Capitol twice and you're... I told myself I had to make sure you ain't on your own till you give birth and sort it out. I don't know. I was lookin' for ways to make it right, to make things right with you. Penance, maybe. Things are falling into place for you now, right? Your family's here."

She bit her bottom lip and he wished she wouldn't do that because he wanted to kiss her again.

"Your sister's husband... He's gonna bring somethin' against this company and Omana," he told her. "Might be good if you're here… You might need to give a statement or – "

"I don't want to have anything to do with this company anymore," Effie simpered. "I want to put it behind me. He can do what he wants. I want no part of it. I'm tired, Haymitch. I'm so tired."

"Come with me," he insisted.

"You'll come back to the Capitol for the Avox Rehabilitation Programme."

That was true. He could see her then except…

"That's not what I want. I don't want to spend a few days with you. You think that's going to be enough? I want all of it or nothing."

"That's not fair."

"I know," he agreed. "I am a selfish man. I've never gotten what I want, Effie, hardly. All I ask for now is you."

She pulled away from him and he figured that he had already lost her. He was too insistent. He had pushed her too far.

"Marilla's their child," she said softly. "I will be imposing on them."

"Yes," he replied far too quickly and he felt disgusted with himself.

At the core of it, perhaps he wasn't that much different that this facility. Manipulative.

"They need to spend time together as a family. Eirene would need to bond with her daughter and I …"

Her eyes hardened and Haymitch knew that look. It meant she had decided upon something and would see it through. It was a look that she shouldn't be trifled with.

"You will bring me with you when you return to the Capitol each month. _I_ helped you with the Avox Rehabilitation Programme so I am a part of it just as much as you. I will come back and we'll be here for days, I can spend it with Marilla."

His gaze snapped to her. Was he hearing her right?

She approached him then and wrapped her arms around his waist. He was aware of her in his embrace but he was still too stunned.

"I don't want to lose you, Haymitch. When Omana found out about you, I was certain I will never see you again. I want to keep you both – you and Marilla – but she's not truly mine the way you can be. She's family. But you…. This will work out, it has to. It will work out."

"It will," he echoed, pressing a kiss at the crown of her head and he wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight.

XxX

Effie carried a bag containing her little belongings and a photo of Marilla still in the incubator in the pocket of her blouse. Eirene had promised to call every other day with updates and when Marilla could be discharged once she could breathe and feed on her own, Effie promised to visit. Eirene made him promise to visit, too.

The last they saw of Omana was when she came to Effie's hospital room with a cheque for her fees. Haymich had jammed his hands in his pocket to stop himself from strangling the woman, knowing that she would have her own justice later. The moment they board a train, safe from the vicinity of the City, Marius would talk to her.

As they stood at the traffic junction where they had first crossed paths waiting for the lights to turn green, Effie brushed her hand against him.

"Hold my hand," she requested.

He glanced over at her and slid his hand into hers.

They went back to the diner one last time because Effie was sentimental. She drank tea and he had coffee laced with whiskey.

"I will miss this place," she lamented.

He rolled his eyes. "We can always come back and have greasy food."

"Oh, I'd rather not," she huffed.

He couldn't help the small smile. At that moment, Effie sounded like the one he knew. It was a slow progress, but it was there.

"Finish your coffee," she instructed. "We have to be at the train station in half an hour."

"We have time."

"I know. I – I want to sit in the train before I change my mind."

He blinked, blindsided by that confession.

"Effie... ," he released a breath. "Look, if you don't want to come back - "

"I want to. I want go with you. I want to meet Katniss and Peeta. It's just... I don't trust myself. I should let my sister, her husband and their … child... grow as a family but a part of me yearns to stay and another…. I want to be with you," she reached out and squeezed his hand reassuringly. "I will come. Just get me to the train station."

And she did.

She alternated between watching the sceneries out of the window and sleeping on his shoulder. When they stepped off the train at District Twelve, she was quiet. Haymitch did most of the talking. He pointed to this building and that, to that shop and this shop. He told her of the changes to District Twelve over the past six years and when they came upon a familiar rode, he could tell she was relieved to see something that she recognised.

At the entrance of Victor's Village, Effie stood quietly. She squinted against the sun's glare at the blue house not far in the distance.

"Your house," she said.

He stood next to her, waiting until she was ready to step forward.

"We'll make this your home."

The words were spoken softly and this time, it was she who reached out for him, threading their fingers together.

"Home," she nodded. "Yes, I'd like that."

* * *

_THE END._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you've enjoyed reading That's Not My Baby. I thought I'll never see this story complete but I did it! Thanks for all the reviews and your support. Please leave a review one last time for this chapter. And do check out my new hayffie AU - The Corner Shop!

**Author's Note:**

> Alright, I'm pretty sure people are sick of me by now but ... BUT... I was reading this article on Baby Factory in India when this story popped into my mind. So I had to write it down and I thought I'd just share it. (I wrote Chapter 1 of this story in 2013 and recently started working on it again)


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